Journal: Deeper State

If someone has ever said to you that ”everything you know is wrong” they could not have been more right…

But, it’s not like anything you could possibly have imagined. It is deep. It is infinite and probably a lot more difficult to navigate than our current mundane existence (ignorance and bliss).

I hear the term ”deep state”, in the news. It refers to an unseen powerful organization pulling the strings in American politics and policy. I am now getting a glimpse of something of a greater influence. Something unseen and possibly even obscene to some. A very different level of consciousness.

I’m going to refer to this other level of consciousness as the ”deeper state”. It is what you begin to see as you allow your conscious self to expand. You see a deeper state of mind, a deeper state of consciousness.

As I continue, I can begin to understand how the mind and consciousness are intertwined.


Journal: One Of Those Days

I’m having one of those days again.

I am happy. I am joyful. I am optimistic. I am watching this happen and (as I have stated before) I kind of hold back, afraid that I am acting foolish.

When I think about the past few days, I observe myself being someone I have not seen in some time; that happy side of me.

One of the more inspiring aspects of my happiness is that I find consciousness always responds in kind…

Thank you

Journal: I Feel Alive

On the 26th of March, I had an extraordinarily unique experience. My entire body was resonating, or vibrating at a unique and distinct frequency.

I experienced a semi tingling sensation as well as an overwhelming emotional state of relief. I remember repeating ”I feel alive”.

I have no current explanation for this event. Until I am presented with an acceptable explanation it shall remain cautiously enigmatic.

Regardless of the lack of a viable explanation, I am very grateful, nonetheless.

Journal: I am not alone

I just finished importing my blogger posts to this site. As I was reviewing the import of the blogger site’s posts I saw there was a comment I received from a reader on blogger and he suggested that I visit Carissa Conti’s site He thought that it would help explain what I am experiencing.

I just read some of Carissa’s posts again and see that she is going through some similar changes.

Her site and book Chasing Phantoms tell of her experiences that are similar to my own, but also very different. It is interesting how a person’s own personal narrative is constructed by their frame of reference.

Carissa’s experiences involve some kind of abduction. In the past, I also suspected alien interference, control, and abduction, but I now lean more toward some kind of phase differential between levels of conscious realities. Possibly two or more levels sharing a temporal resonance (vibrating at the same frequency, portal) whether for a purpose or anomalous characteristics of consciousness. Those that move between levels might not be interpreted as they exist in their level of origin.

Please take a look at her site, it is a different perspective on what I have experienced. I had contacted Carissa after I received the comment on my blog, but she did not reply. She stated on her site that she received far too many ”gang stalking” inquiries and decided not to reply to those inquiries at that time. It seems as though she has changed her view and now has a page called: Gang Stalking vs. Hyperdimensional Matrix Attacks.

TI: Lars Mittank

I am going to start to post cases of alleged targeted individuals that I come across on the world wide web.

On an earlier post, I mentioned the Las Vegas mass shooting perpetrator as a targeted individual based on his behavior. I also mentioned the electronic weapons used on the American embassy in Cuba. This post concerns a missing person named Lars Mittank a German national that went missing in Bulgaria on June 30, 2014.

Lars Mittank was vacationing with friends and ended up in a brawl (row) with other tourists. After suffering an ear injury, Lars chose not to fly home with friends until the injury healed enough to handle pressure changes on an air plane. Surveillance video shows the last known whereabouts of Lars.

The reason why I suggest that Lars was a targeted individual is based upon his behavior while staying at a hostel in Bulgaria and his sudden departure from the airport. The fact that Lars was alone made him an easy target. If one of his friends would have stayed with him, it would have provided him with needed emotional support and the perpetrators probably would not have attacked. His paranoid behavior was similar to mine when under the influence of the electronic weapons. And to go out on a limb, again, they probably used some kind of psychic ability to induce fear and panic while he was at the hostel and also while at the airport; very much like what I still endure.

When I was under attack in Honolulu Hawaii, I wanted to run out of my apartment to somewhere safe. The sensation of the weapons as well as the induced fear makes you want run anywhere else and because the attacks are covert (hidden and undetectable) you cannot be sure if you are starting to lose your grip on reality. For someone that is unfamiliar with these tactics it is a harrowing experience. I chose to stay in my apartment and fend off the attacks until they subsided, I did that for a few months. When I did leave my apartment, I was always being followed by some intimidating people.

If there were people threatening him at the hostel or airport Lars could have attempted to contact the police, but I believe that he didn’t because he had no evidence of the attacks and the weapons induce a state of mistrust in everyone. In a state of panic caused by events and circumstances that are hidden and difficult to explain he did the only thing he could at the time – run.

The nature of the weapons is that they are difficult to detect and have a narrow beam that has the ability to go through walls. The weapons are mobile, hand-held as well as mounted on automobiles. I have found that the weapons can be made ineffective with Faraday shielding using non ferrous metal plates (foil) and screens as well as metal oxides applied with paint. The ultimate protection comes from water. Water has the ability to absorb the harmful energy before it can reach the target.

If Lars was a targeted individual then why? I suspect it was the brawl he got into. Now here where it starts to get deeper into the fringe. There are people (beings) that are indistinguishable from everyone else. These people belong to some kind of organization and if you threaten their safety they will single you out and intimidate you, or target you physically, or undermine your conscious state of mind. If they can undermine your sanity they can have you committed or imprisoned. If Lars is still alive I suspect he is one of many people forced to become part of the homeless population or he is heavily sedated in a mental institution or prison (for his own safety?).

I try to avoid focusing on gang stalking and targeted individual cases. I do so because consciousness will deliver whatever I focus upon. As much as I would like to help all of those that have had these experiences, it would lead down a rabbit hole I am ill prepared for at this time? When I come across an article like this I will post it here. Targeting of individuals are on the rise. Why?

Journal: What Am I Doing?

The best way to describe my current experience does not exist at this time. I cannot express myself in a manner that could convey my emotional state. I have attained a level of surrender that had escaped my evolving frame of reference.

I have been at this for so long that there are new normals every lunar cycle. My intuition once suggested that I should go about this narrative as if it were a game. I guess that I must be entering a whole new game level now.

If you ever played a video game you start to learn when to turn. You learn how to survive then you learn how to win (level up), but to do this you have to play. What happens if I do the least, observe and wait to see where this is going. This shared reality is an illusion where thoughts and actions are necessary to engage the false narrative. I see an opening, but it is difficult setting yourself adrift within the flow of consciousness when old habits interfere with the flow.

Consciousness requires us to be conscious. Meditation requires attentive inaction. Can there be attentive conscious inaction? To be or not to be…

Journal: Here We Are

Well, well, well. It has been a long time. I am in the process of transferring the content from one provider to another. I am making it easy to add content when the mood strikes and the time is right. This is the first post, and it serves as a place holder for the moment.

Stayed tuned more to come.

Change is necessary and inevitable…

Journal: Outer Limits

13th_floor.jpgI’m on the fence. I used to be at a point where I was testing the limits of the boundaries; running into walls, trying to navigate over, under or through. Sometimes I found self on the other side, then the next day I would be back. I stated in an earlier post that once you incorporate experiences it changes your conscious environment, your perceptions and your frame of reference. You can’t experience something without it changing you.

I found a way through that barrier. I guess I finally realized that there is no physical electronic fence that keeps me here. Those that act as antagonists do so because I allow then to. I have the ability to tear down all barriers, simply by changing how I respond to them.

“If thou art pained by any external thing, it is not this thing that disturbs thee, but thy own judgment about it…”

I’m on the fence. The fence is crackling with electrical energy. I feel the sensation of that energy upon my skin. I am accustomed to this sensation. What once was a barrier has now become a way point and soon to become a point of departure.

I sit on the fence looking out towards future destinations. My bags are packed and I am comfortable waiting for whatever may come my way. Comfortable in the flow.

Those outer limits never really existed. That’s the game that is being played. Now it is time to put all that I have said to the test, comfortable knowing that we are all just tourists, passing through time and space within this grand dream.

Last night I saw a butterfly in my dream, prominent point of focus. Beautiful orange and black wings flying among the trees.

There is no spoon…

Journal: Conscious Contraction

teaser-video-stillI am back here again. I am able to recognize this level of consciousness, it is one I have spent too much time trying to escape. The all to familiar annoyances have been waiting for my arrival. So much has changed and so much remains the same. Same old story with different faces.

I spend a good deal of time ascending and expanding consciousness, I am getting pretty good at it, but then I wake up and here I am again, forced to begin again. I should know better when I notice that my conscious environment improves and I am in the flow of consciousness someone or something notices that I do not belong and expect that they will send me back, here.

At times I feel a bit like Dorothy, but unlike Dorothy I kind of prefer Oz to home. This multidimensional dream world is a bit confusing at times, but now that I am aware of what I am experiencing I could never settle for that which is called normal.

One thing that I am noticing as I wake up in this contracted consciousness, I carry with me that which I have gained. I know how to get back and I have discovered that even though not much has changed here (wherever here is), I have changed, significantly and I can effect change wherever I end up.

With each cycle I push farther than the previous. I cannot enter a level of consciousness without changing it in some way. What chaos do I provoke in places I do not belong? What order do I invoke? I sense purpose in my travels. I am seeing as a catalyst to further the expansion of consciousness.

Conscious expansion may be forced to contract, but conscious evolution is permanent and infinite. It is mine for all times. Like I have stated many times in previous posts to my antagonists, see you soon…

The cycle continues and time is irrelevant. Ready or not, here I come, again.

Golden Seed

It has been three years since my arrival back to San Jose, CA. I was told that I would have to wait three years. It was a thought from some other worldly consciousness. I waited, wondering what would happen. I had a lot of time to think about it. I watched the days go by, some with great patience and many in absence of patience. I thought it would be over. Lay my weary he’d to rest and cry no more. 

Well before the eve of the end of my waiting I felt something changing within me. I fought it at first. I welcomed it also. But, it was not until this day that I realized that I can no longer fight nor welcome it. I cannot have any other emotional or intellectual reaction to its presence. It is and that is all I can say about it. 
I surmise that it has happened before. A sensation of change within one’s physical or spiritual self. Much like growing up as a child, a surge of sexual hormones, wisdom teeth or hair growing where there was once none. You notice the change and then accept it because it is part of the natural process. But, I can’t just write this one off as something that I may have been expecting because it is certainly unexpected and especially special. 
The best way to describe this change is that something has taken root. Much like a viral infection that slowly transforms the physical self this is a viral infection of the spirt and of the conscious soul. I fear it in a way because I have forgotten what it was like to feel this way everyday. It is somewhat foreign and yet very familiar. It is growing within me with greater depth and breadth every passing moment. I can feel it coming over me and there is nothing I can do to stop it now. 
I see it in the eyes of my family members. I seem to see it everywhere. It shines through the facade of our daily expressions and moods. Like a contagion, I feel it taking over. I feel it tightening its grip as I exhale. It’s forcing me to remember my past before I was filled with distrust, fear, depression and regret. Even though I have had moments of feeling something similar to this it did not last. This is different because it’s not going away. This is rooted in something far more substantial. 
I want to call it love, but love cannot describe it. Contentment and bliss are close but fall short also. There is no word I am familiar with that is capable of explaining what I am experiencing. I feel it welling outward. Sometimes it reminds me of those familiar butterflies without the emotional constituent. All I can do is surrender to it. I don’t seem to have a choice – anymore. 
Thank you Rose…

Now Following Ask Aliens


I cannot claim that aliens exist. The typical alien that we are all familiar with may or may not exist. I have not seen one, so I cannot comment on the existence of extraterrestrials. But, I have had some mind blowing experiences in the last year that have forced me to reformat my frame of reference.

I contacted Ask Aliens out of desperation, while I was in Hawaii and an interesting thing happened after making contact with whoever runs the site. The activity of the Nameless stopped considerably and I started to see some people that were very different from those I refer to as the Nameless observing me closely. Because of the attacks that I endured at the hands of the Nameless I wasn’t in the best state of mind to approach anyone. Everyone was suspect and I did not allow myself to trust anyone.  Since that time in Hawaii there has been a shift in the behavior of the Nameless and their activity. They operate more covertly as if they are trying to keep their activity a secret not only to us, but also to other beings or entities in this plane of existence.

I cannot be certain of what may be happening, but things have changed considerably since contacting the person that runs the Ask Aliens Blogspot. I do not know if the Arcturians had anything to do with the changes I have experienced or that they are protecting me in some way. I am grateful in any case. Anything is possible, I for one am sure of that now.

Ask Aliens is promoting something that I am very much in tune with and that is to move toward a more positive state of consciousness. I will be posting more about this in the future. Take a few moments of your time and see what it’s all about