Posts from original blog www.i-am-xam.com/blog.html.


06.25.11 – I have found evidence that my email has been hacked by someone. Good to know that I am not completely paranoid. There have been a number of email messages that were deleted before I had a chance to read them. If any of you have sent email asking questions or offering assistance and you did not receive a reply please resend the message. I am working with my ISP to prevent this from happening again. Again I’d like to thank all of you that have sent, and continue to send, me support and love.


06.29.11 – I am pretty amazed at the level of meditation I am able to achieve after a short time working with the Flower of Life mandala. I am reaching level of silence I have been unable to reach since my relationship with the Nameless took on a more sinister character.
    I have noticed some changes in my habits and attitude that seem to originate from my own will. I find myself doing the right things automatically with out much resistance. It is strange to see myself taking these small steps in the right direction. The self talk has taken on a different character and I am finding that within myself is a more compassionate personality. Today I looked into the mirror and saw myself differently. For the first time in a very long time, I actually liked what I saw. There is something I can now see in my own eyes that was missing. It is familiar to me. Like seeing an old childhood friend for the first time in a very long time.
    I have recently read that the FOL brings about a closer connection with your true self as the ego begins to relinquish control. I have always had a difficult time with the ego. Many times I have beaten it back only to have it resurface again, and now it seems a bit easier to keep the ego at bay. The first few days using the FOL mandala were not so smooth as I found it difficult to adjust to what I was feeling, but now it looks as if that period may be over. I need to spend more time with the FOL. I have spent over ten years working with the Sri Yantra mandala. I don’t remember making a lot of progress with it in such a short amount of time. The FOL is very different, profoundly different.
    My more recent research into the holographic universe and the Kabbalah has caused my assailants to turn up the radiation the past couple of days. Even though I had always believed that reality is an illusion of our perceived world, it did not hit as hard as it has hit me lately. The part that states that we are all one consciousness within a small space in time is beginning to make far too much sense to me. The whole concept is starting to come together in a very different way for me. Right now I trying to readjust my perceptions to match this concept, again. I feel like it is on the tip of my tongue, so to speak. More to come for sure. 
    They are making things difficult for me, but I still have a feeling that I will come throughs this a better person. I am very grateful for this information that I am able to share with all of you.

Posts from original blog www.i-am-xam.com/blog.html.


06.24.11 – I had always been fascinated with crop circles just because I thought they were beautiful. I never really thought that they were created by aliens and UFOs. I felt that they were created by higher dimensional beings that are part of our consciousness and that these images were a message of some kind. I started watching videos on crop circle phenomena and after watching the videos I noticed that there was an improvement in my conscious environment which I call my conscious cloud. I never knew why this happened and would periodically watch the video to find out why this happened. What I started to discover that at a particular point in a video I would stop thinking and my focus would increase. At that time, I was not able to figure out which crop circle image caused this change in my thought process or made a connection with me.
    Due to the things that have been happening in my life recently, I have been exposed to all sorts of information from those that have contacted me via some of social networks. Sacred geometry started to become a reoccurring theme in the information I was receiving in either text or symbols. Sacred geometry was something that I was interested in, but I never made a connection or a solid spiritual connection until recently. After watching a series of videos called Sacred Geometry & Unified Fields Part 1 by Nassim Haramein it was revealed to me the importance of the crop circle video and images.

   The information presented by Nassim was very interesting and I do recommend watching the complete set of six. I think that he has formed a comprehensive unifying theory in physics. It was not until the last video of the presentation that I was able to make understand why this presentation came into my life. Some images that were presented (Part 6 time: 13:45) as part of his presentation looked similar to one of the crop circles in the video I was watching as part of my daily meditation. When I searched through the video for the image, I found it was in the area of the video that would start to change my focus.

   I immediately started to search for images and information concerning the image of the Egyptian symbol in the presentation. I discovered information concerning something called the Flower of Life and it’s role in sacred geometry. The crop circle image in my video is a variation of the Seed of Life. The Seed of Life is constructed using the first seven center circles of the Flower of Life. I then began a search to find a suitable mandala of the FOL. After finding a few images, I then used one image as mandala for meditation.

    My first meditation was amazing. I immediately dropped into a highly focused state of mind while maintaining a heightened state of awareness. It was similar to the brief change in my state of mind that I began to fall into while watching the crop circle video. I finally discovered why it was important for me to continue my interest in crop circles. I have been using the image as part of my daily meditation and I am seeing positive changes in my conscious environment. I still have to spend a lot more time with this tool, but I wanted to share this info with those of you that are not aware of the Flower of Life and the potential use for spiritual transformation. I have to add that my adversaries were not very happy when I was doing my initial searches concerning sacred geometry and ultimately the Flower of Life.

Posts from original blog www.i-am-xam.com/blog.html.


06.20.11 – The attacks started about 5 years ago. The first began when I was driving home at night on a narrow canyon road. I thought that I was having a heart attack, it came on suddenly and I almost lost consciousness. It happened again a few days later while driving at night, it was the same feeling. Both times I had to pull over and submit to it. I did not happen again and I blamed it on some supplements I was taking and forgot about it. About three to four months ago it happen again, but this time I was in my apartment. The same feeling that I had while driving came over me while I was standing in my apartment. It was the time when the Nameless were very active and overt about watching me. This time I knew it wasn’t a heart attack. I was able to feel the energy beam they were using as I moved about my apartment. I could escape it for a few moments before it found me again. It was tracking me in my apartment no matter where I moved. The energy beam was definitely in the skies above me. I never saw it or heard it I only felt it. I ended up wrapped in wet towels sitting on the floor. After a couple of nights of constant attacks I heard some air force aircraft above and shortly after that the beam weapon stopped. It would return a couple other nights, but the roar of a jet overhead would end the attack. That began the set of circumstances I find myself in right now. The psychic attacks and the constant surveillance are what is left of their war against me.
    Yesterday I went to the health market and was attacked by a skinny middle aged woman. There was nothing really special about her, but she was the only one I kept finding in the same isles I was shopping. She would stand by me whenever she could. I did not move away from her. I did not suspect her, nor did I care. I wanted to see if I could withstand an attack after exposing myself to higher levels of aetheric energy. I left the store and packed my goods in a shoulder bag and went home. I noticed that the left side of my chest ached and thought that it was caused by the shoulder bag. It felt like a strained muscle more than anything else. Later that night the soreness increased, but not enough to be a problem. The increased aetheric exposure seems to have a way of diminishing the effects of the attack, but I can’t be sure. The attacks are more of a nuisance than anything else. I am growing tired of their antics.
    They have gone through some covert methods to end my life. They are persistent parasites of consciousness and they are all over mine. I was reminded of the drugs and chemicals they put in my food and supplements. The day before my most recent encounter with them, I used some cayenne pepper that I had not used since I discovered they were entering my apartment. I had a difficult time focussing about 30 minutes after taking the cayenne. I started thinking about my rapid weight loss and some of the other side effects from whatever they were putting in my supplements, all of it was probably done to make it look like a natural death due to illness. They seem to be taking the long slow path to ensuring my demise. For some reason I am surviving. At this point it would be easier for me to die and take my chances in ascending in the after life. Someone or something is keeping me here for reasons I can’t figure out. I used to call the Locum Tenens because I thought they were here to replace us. I am starting to think that they are here to control us.
    I am trying to manifest or rewrite my life in a manner that is void of my current circumstances. I am trying to get my projects done and move on again. I know that I am responsible for my life, but I haven’t found a way to rid myself of these people or beings. A day after the last attack I have seen people taking pictures of me again. I’m starting to feel like an animal at the zoo. I am the anomaly that is capable of surviving the attacks from the Nameless, I’ve become a side show. I’d rather try to think that the ones that are taking pictures are the ones that are watching over me. I would appreciate it if they would show me the way out of this mess. I catch them with their cameras pointed at me and then quickly drop their hands and look away. I walk away thinking that I really need to wake up from this dream.
    Right now I feel fine. Seems like the only thing that helps to heal is a strong overwhelmingly positive feeling that overtakes me when I meditate. I think about my attackers. I have no hatred or animosity towards them. I just want them to stop. Then slowly the ache goes away and I’m back to normal (my level of normal).

Posts from original blog www.i-am-xam.com/blog.html.


06.13.11 – I have been feeling pretty good lately and have entered my feelings into my journal and video journal. Every time I make an entry concerning my positive emotional state my captors turn up the electromagnetic radiation and focus it on my head whenever I am at home. I really don’t have to make an entry, I just think about making an entry or think about the next blog post and they will ratchet up the radiation. I believe they do this in an attempt to keep me in a perpetual state of negativity and depression, but I’m not going to allow this to continue. I am now waking up and having a good day regardless of how I may be feeling. I am tired of feeling helpless.
    A couple of weeks ago, when I was going through an emotional period, as posted on 06.06.11, the radiation was minimal. I know that when I do very little to oppose them they leave me alone. When I post on my blogs and contact people online the radiation starts to increase. This is a classic behavioral conditioning experiment, pain and discomfort when I am disobedient and relief when I am compliant. I have always been overly sensitive to changes in my environment, I have to wonder if this sort of conditioning might be happening to others that are not so sensitive. I try to steer clear of a grand conspiracy to control the masses, but my experiences make me believe that this sort of thing may be going on. It is effective. I have modified my behavior. It is difficult not to since they know everything I do. Regardless of my modified behavior, I’m still looking for a way out. I still have hope that this will end soon.
    I am always looking to make some changes that would allow me to move to another location, but I have to make sure that the landlord is not associated with the people I call the Nameless. I now realize that the last 2-3 places that I have rented were associated, owned or managed by the Nameless. I just can’t figure out how this is possible. Their ability to contain and control me in this way is still hard for me to believe. Until I can make some contacts that I can trust and feel that I can escape them, I’ll have to stay put. I can’t be sure that the next place I move will be any better or worse than my current place. I can’t risk endangering any of my family members, by moving in with them. Right now, I’m their lab rat in this strange experiment that is my life.


06.14.11 – The device that I mentioned in a past post was also something I used to keep the Nameless from attacking me. I found that they would not attack me when I carried and active device on me. The Nameless seem to have a way to detect the energy from the device. I do not know if the energy is harmful to them, but they will stay clear of it. Initially they would not come around at all, but they adapted somehow. Some of them were still able to do whatever they do to attack me, but the amount of time they were able to stand by me was decreased due to the energy emitted by the device. I was also at a lower energy level at that time and I interpreted my conscious environment in a different way. Using the device has allowed me to raise my energy level and rise to a higher level within my current level of consciousness. As I maintain this level of energy I am finding that I am better able to survive any attacks. I am also noticing that there are not as many of them around. What I am beginning to understand is that the aetheric energy from the device is restoring my subtle luminous energy or aura. The radiation that I feel on a daily basis in my apartment diminishes that subtle luminous energy. As I have stated before, they try and take away whatever I can replenish. I am beginning believe that our modern technological environment is responsible for diminished levels of subtle luminous energy in everyone. I am now wondering if this is not a coincidence.Another interesting thing that I have noticed about the people that are watching me. When I am able to identify them as the Nameless or their minions, I may see them one more time, but then I won’t see them anymore. It is a strange game they are playing. They can be very obvious and we will look at each other from a distance, somehow acknowledging that we know what is going on. I have seen all types of people, young and old men, women and even young men that try to blend in with some sort of maintenance uniform (like the ones I saw today). They all stand out in my conscious environment, I can sense them is some way. Once I have noticed them watching me I rarely ever see them again. Why? This is a good thing, in a way, because if I was delusional I would be seeing the same people all the time. Either that or my delusion might have an extensive range of characters to draw from. The one exception to this scenario is my neighbor, unfortunately he is still here. With all that I have experienced concerning the people I call the Nameless, I still have a hard time understanding what is going on. I still have a feeling that all that I am experiencing is not real. Just the other day, I tried to force myself to wake up. It was just like I do when I am having a bad dream, but nothing happened, nothing changed…
    I have been reading the Bardo Thodol (Tibetan book of the Dead) and the Egyptian Book of the Dead. I can’t help feeling that these people are the demons that are sent to torment me during my transition. I do not know how many of them I have identified, but there can’t be too many more left. The demons have shown me my own ugliness and I have changed because of it. What now? I am not looking to reincarnate, I am still searching for enlightenment.

Posts from original blog www.i-am-xam.com/blog.html.


06.12.11 – I have been using the device to restore and maintain my aetheric energy levels. Over a 3-4 month period I have gradually increased the amount of exposure to a point where I can only feel the side effects at the upper limits of my body’s aetheric threshold. I am at maximum exposure at this time for my current design. I am using a xenon strobe light at 20 flashes per second without any of the side effects caused by overexposure. The illuminated xenon tube greatly increases the amount of aetheric energy that is created or extracted from the environment. I am also exposing myself to prolonged illuminated halogen bulbs in the presence of the scalar wave of the device. I expose my drinking water and food to the aetheric energy an have noticed a slight reduction in the rate of deterioration of the food caused by mold and/or bacteria. I have also used the illuminated xenon strobe and device to disinfect the kitchen and bathroom. I do not know if the disinfecting ability is due to the light (possible ultraviolet spectrum) or if the aetheric energy is inhibiting the growth of the bacteria.
    I made an interesting discovery while exposing some really green bananas as I waited for them to ripen. The bananas took about a a week and a half to ripen and what I discovered is that they were unusually sweet and relatively firm. When I had bought really green bananas in the past they started to turn brown before they were edible. This time they stayed mostly green and started to turn yellow just as they began to get soft. I thought it was interesting to note the effects the device can have on food that is still developing and ripening. The aetheric energy extracted by the device may also have positive effects on living plants possible increase in growth and yield. Those of you that are growing herbs (lavender, lemongrass, cat’s claw, or even cannabis) may want to experiment with rates of exposure and how it effects yield and potency.

The image above is of a smaller aetheric device that can be easily made using 1 inch diameter, 1/4 inch thick, 1/4 inch hole Neodymium (NdFeB) magnets www.emovendo.net, a 1/4 inch nylon, brass or aluminum bolt/nut and a horseshoe xenon flash bulb from Radio Shack or other online electronics suppliers. The magnets are bound together with like poles facing each other. The magnets need to be handled with care because they have strong magnetic fields. These large magnets are capable of slamming into each other and pinching your skin between them. The magnets can shatter when they slam together. Be careful! This mini device is a great way to start experimenting with aetheric energy.

The original devices at the top of the image are made with PVC end caps with a 1-7/8 inch inside diameter. The smaller magnets are 3/4 inch diameter, 1/8 inch thick, with a 1/8 inch hole. They are positioned on the PVC cap with holes drilled at 60 degree angles from each other, 3/8 inch from the cap’s edge. In this design the south poles are all bound together. This is important. All magnet sets must be bound together in the same manner for each device (scalar waves are produced when two electromagnetic waves of the same frequency are exactly out of phase – in this case we are using magnets that are canceling out one another). In this device all exposed magnet faces have a north polarity. All the south poles are touching each other and bound together. The larger magnets are the same magnets used in the mini device and are fastened to the inside center of the cap. Do not use steel parts in the frame or fasteners (copper, aluminum, brass, plastic are best). The device emits more energy because the scalar wave field is larger and stronger. Please experiment and improve on the design or come up with one of your own. A little more info on the device can be found on my blog on Spiritualnetworks.com.

Posts from original blog www.i-am-xam.com/blog.html.


06.11.11 – The attacks have been limited, because I have limited my exposure. As I mentioned in the last post, I am receiving guidance in some interesting ways and I am very grateful to those that are offering their assistance. I can not explain exactly how this is happening, but I am very pleased. Thank you.
    I am a firm believer that we manifest the circumstances of our lives through consciousness. I am still at a loss to how I brought about my current set of circumstances, because it is something that is well outside of anything I could have possibly imagined. I am currently attempting to manifest a better life for myself and everyone else within the construct of this level of consciousness or dimension. The sense that we are all connected through consciousness is growing stronger in me everyday. I know that I can not effect the greater consciousness alone and hope that I can find others that will help. It is clear to me that it is up to us to end all causes of suffering. Conflict, subjugation, exploitation and all the other negative acts and thoughts that seem to exist at levels that are unacceptable for any civilized society.
    One thing that I consistently try to manifest is the a better life for all beings, even those that watch and attack me. But, there is also a feeling within me that there is a greater and higher power involved. It is there waiting and willing to help us if we seek that greater power out. I can not be sure where that greater power resides, but if we are part of the greater consciousness, then that which we seek may very well be hidden within us all. Strangely enough I am now feeling that we are headed for a significant positive emotional event. I have never given into what I used to call New Age rhetoric, so there is still a part of me that remains skeptical of my own feelings. We’ll just have to wait and see.
    I am grateful for the online contacts that I am making. Even though not much is said they have lead me in new and interesting directions. I do not know if I am any closer in understanding what is actually going on in my life or society as a whole, but one day I hope to have an answer. One day we will discover the truth. Right now, for some reason, I believe it will be a positive outcome for everyone. I hope that this feeling does not change. Having those positive feelings keep me sane, or at least allows me to hold on to whatever is left of my sanity.

Posts from original blog www.i-am-xam.com/blog.html.


06.06.11 – I’m back after an emotional week of straddling this new reality, delusion, or whatever, of mine. I want to think that I am tough enough to handle this, but I have my moments where I have to give up and have to get away. Last week I wanted to accept that I was delusional. Being delusional would be easier to accept while giving me a chance to seek help and put an end to this. Delusional or not, I have come this far down the rabbit hole I might as well see it through. They are winning to an extent because they have the advantage, but things are beginning to change for the better.
    In my attempts to understand what I am going through, I am beginning to find glimpses that I am not the only one being watched or possibly attacked. The prior post mentions an interesting account of White Wolf’s experiences. The similarities that we share are that we are being watched and had talked with these people, but when he mentioned that he was offered white powdered gold from them I remembered that I was made an offer in the past also.
    As I reassess my past there are individuals that have stood out for one reason or another. One person was a friend of someone I met and hung out with for about a year. For the purpose of this post, let’s call the guy I hung out with “C”. C and I had similar interests and C used psychedelics in order to expand consciousness as well as using new age and other esoteric methods. As I remember C’s friend, he had most of the attributes of the people I refer to as the Nameless. When C and I hung out, C’s friend would be there also. There was an incident where C’s friend had knowledge of a comment I had made in his absence about some trivial subject. When he made the comment he had a look on his face as if he was challenging me (I had also experienced this sort of behavior while at college from a professor, concerning my views on a particular subject – some sort of mind game used by the Nameless). He also made a statement in reference to my true feelings I never discussed with anyone else. It was obvious that he was pulling my strings. I have to admit that he was successful in doing so. I found him interesting, but that is an attribute of someone with a higher level of energy or aura, a typical attribute of some of the Nameless.
    At the time I began to spend less time C, C’s friend sent me an email about WPG. I did not reply because I was already taking WPG from a source I found online. If I had not been familiar with WPG at the time I would have probably answered his email and taken his offer. There seems to be a pattern in how certain people are being approached and offered WPG. C was being watched, befriended and offered WPG just as with White Wolf’s account. Whether or not this is some sort of trap, I can not say. But I must urge caution in the use of WPG and how your are introduced to it. True WPG is a gray-ish white crystalline powder. It is odorless and tasteless, but it feels like a chemical residue on the tongue similar to a chemical reaction. It does not burn or disintegrate when heated. It does not dissolve in water. When it is placed in water it will look sort of like semen.
    A Native American shaman that I met some time ago, after my trip into the void, warned me and everyone he knew to stay out of the cities. He never stated why, but he was very serious concerning this warning. He was a person that had strong intuitive abilities that would border upon prescience. Because he lives off the grid, It has been many years since I have spoken to him, but I now wonder if he knew of the people I call the Nameless.
    If you are a person that has made some significant inroads into your own consciousness then pay attention to those that are around you. I cannot be sure that you will experience the things I have, but be diligent in how you go about continuing your journey. The Nameless are capable of many things when they are close to you, and even when they are not. As I have experienced they are even capable of entering your home when you are away and placing drugs in your food and supplements in order to deter your progress.
     I have been asking for assistance and I believe my pleas are again being answered. Conversations I have had with people I have just met have lead to warn me of things to come. Words that stand out in a conversation only to later serve their purpose in my daily life is bizarre even for me. I have had similar warnings in my dreams, but never have I received a warning like this in my waking life. When I ask for assistance I ask them to come forward and explain what I am going through, but when I experience these bizarre happenings I question wether I am ready to know or able to understand everything I am going through. I can see that I am still being watched, but I can not tell if there could be some that are protecting me. Until I can figure out friend from foe I at their mercy and deceptions.
    The more I discover the more strange it all becomes. Keep sending me suggestions about what you believe may be happening. I stumbled into all of this looking for the truth and It seems that I have gotten more than I was ready to handle and there is still more to come. I have attempted to contact David Icke as some have suggested, but I have not heard anything from him or his site yet. I have stopped my own use of WPG until I can contact my source and talk to them about what I am experiencing. The Nameless seem to be punishing me when I take my WPG, but this may be a deception (Hell, I can’t be sure of anything anymore). I have sent the modern alchemists that I purchase WPG from a letter and asked for them to contact me, but they have not done so to date. I have experienced times when I have not received email from friends and family. I can’t be sure if this is going on now. If I have not replied to emails any of you have sent to me it is because I did not receive it. I reply to all messages receive, no matter what the subject may be. If I have not replied to your email, please be persistent or attempt to contact me via the social networks and twitter. Thank all of you for your love and support., it helps me stay focussed.

Posts from original blog www.i-am-xam.com/blog.html.


05.23.11 – The strange scenario of my life continues to play out in surreal ways. As I walk through the parking lot of my dentist, I see one of the people I suspect to be watching me leaving the office of my dentist. I nod my head as I walk past him and he does the same. I could not help but laugh. I firmly believe that there is no such thing as coincidence. Everything we encounter in our lives is for us to experience and acknowledge. There is a purpose to all that we see. What was he doing there? Was it just part of the mind games they play? I am not going to go into some rant about the possibilities of my encounter. I am not going to do that to myself anymore. So far things went well for me at the dentist and I am not suffering from some heart attack or anything else yet. Since all of this started I have learned to analyze people. The dentist and his assistant were acting as if they knew something. Most of the time people can’t hide what they know about you.
    I am the focus of these people, or whatever they are. What is the proper response to this scenario I am involved in? I think about how helpless I was when I was writing the book, being attacked everyday inside my box. Now is not much different. Although I am not attacked as much since I published the ebook, I still feel like I am enclosed in a box. Just a bigger box…


05.25.11 – The attacks continue. I ran the parcourse at a local park and had an interesting experience. Everything was going well until I stopped at a station to perform some exercises. An older man started up a conversation with me about diet. I talked with him and with my usual suspicion noticed that he was repositioning himself in a strange manner. I would move to the left or to the right a little and he would move also. I looked around but, I could not see anything that posed a threat to me. The conversation was pleasant and I didn’t mind the chance to talk with someone. After about 10-15 minutes we ended the conversation and I resumed running the parcourse. After about 2 minutes of running I felt very fatigued. Considering that amount of running I do on the parcourse it was not usual for me to feel so fatigued. I continued my exercise, having to stop a few times to walk to recover.
    The game continues even though I am not a willing participant. I will endure. I will adapt. And, I will post it here for all to see until they finally succeed in ending me…


05.29.11 – The attacks have been minimal the past few days, but as I was working on a blog entry I went to “Mono Atomic Gold -Think Twice” and “White Owl on The Dangers of Monoatomic Gold & ‘Enki’ Aliens” to see if I could find some current information concerning white powdered gold. As soon as I started to read some of the information on the site, the level of electromagnetic radiation that is used to deter me from doing things and punish me rose considerably. I interpreted this as an indication that they do not want me to read the information on the site, so I stayed, read the information, and even contacted the site’s owner for more information.
    I have read that WPG is some kind of tool of clandestine groups wanting to harm others. If this is so then why is the group I have been dealing with opposed to my use of WPG. I seem to have been able to use WPG and become a problem for the clandestine group I call the Nameless. What are they afraid of me discovering? What are they afraid of you discovering? White Owl, if you are able to read this post please contact me.

Posts from original blog www.i-am-xam.com/blog.html.


05.18.11 – I am still alive an well. I have been signing up with other networking sites and posting on the network blogs – Evolver and SprititualNetworks. My assailants were not too happy with my online activity last night and turned up the electro magnetic radiation on me. I am countering the effects with the device as usual. I am reaching out to as many people as possible. I hope to make some connections and some changes as I progress. The more I can connect with others the better. Thanks for all the love I have been receiving. I am very grateful.


05.19.11 – Things are beginning to change. I can see some positive changes in my conscious cloud. I am figuring out ways to keep my energy high. Due to my past and current circumstances, I’ll never stop looking over my shoulder. I don’t expect that the Nameless will ever leave me alone. The Nameless are deceptive people. They have worked their way into my life before as friends and colleagues. I am not going to prevent them from doing that again, but I will be paying close attention to those I let get close to me.
    I am not going to allow myself to become isolated again. I can’t imagine that I will have close friends in the future, but I will make as many contacts with as many different kinds of people I can. Those of the Nameless that have a higher energy level will always stand out in my conscious cloud, it’s their minions that will be more difficult to figure out. I intend to employ the tactic of keeping my enemies closer than my friends. This is not without risk, but it beats the alternative. I will gain more experience engaging them instead of avoiding them.
    I know I can’t be the only one being watched and attacked by these people. I’ll keep posting here as this continues. Keep the emails coming, I’ll reply to all of them.


05.23.11 – The Nameless have begun to fade into the background of my life. I have been doing the things that I need to do according to my interpretation of my conscious cloud. I am rising to a higher level within my current level. I see the improvements in my life as I stay focused. This is presenting some interesting scenarios for me. I am faced with another challenge of determining if I am moving away from the Nameless or moving closer into their realm. I will not be able to determine this until I am well into this new level of consciousness. I had written a blog about the device I have been using to help retain any energy that is being stripped from me via their electromagnetic radiation. I wrote that I began to see that consciousness may have a connection to the concept of multiple dimensions. Ascendance might actually be the movement from one dimension to the next. After posting the blog on Spiritualnetworks.com, I expected them to increase the radiation today as some sort of punishment, but that did not happen yet.
    Everything has been fairly quiet. It is kind of disturbing in a way. I have a dental appointment today that I have postponed for some time. For the past three to four months, I stayed away from all areas of the medical profession for fear that they might be part of the Nameless. Today I have to take a chance and see if this dentist is going to inject me with something that may facilitate some illness in the near future. I have to wonder if the Nameless have planned something for this day. It’s been too quiet for comfort. Paranoid? Yes I am, and I don’t think that I will ever be able to rid myself of this mistrust. Everyone is suspect. I have to accept this as part of my life right now…

Posts from original blog www.i-am-xam.com/blog.html.


05.15.11 – Since I have stopped using cannabis, I noticed that there is a difference in my ability to project my thoughts. There may be a connection with white powdered gold and cannabis use, possibly in the way the mind projects and intercepts thoughts. While I was using medicinal cannabis, I had more strange experiences with people that I believe are part of the group I call the Nameless. The volume or strength of my thoughts were more easily perceived or heard by these people. The shock on their faces was unmistakeable as I passed them. I can not be sure, but this may be the cause for keeping cannabis illegal. How THC/CBD and white powdered gold interact should be investigated. There may be some kind of enhancement of cognitive abilities with the use of both substances. Cannabis could also interfere with some of the abilities the Nameless have over the rest of us.


05.16.11 – I went to a sporting event. There were a lot of different people at the event and the crowd was pleasant. I was having a good time. It was good to be out in public again. I noticed that the Nameless were out and about as usual. There were several of them participating in the event. They stood out as usual.
    As the event ended, I noticed one lady that separated herself from the crowd. She was attractive in the higher energy aspect, but not so physically. She was one of them. She stood by herself for a while. There weren’t any people within about ten feet of her. She was not close enough to me to cause me any harm, but I kept tabs on her. I had stayed longer than I intended and I was about to leave when I felt a malevolent presence. Some foreboding feelings quickly came over me. I thought that it was a good time to leave and I did so, almost without thinking. As I left the area the feeling subsided.
    When I got home I thought about what I felt at the event. I questioned my reaction as well as how fast the malevolent feeling ended as I left the area. I have had similar feelings while in my apartment when I was writing my book. I suspect that that lady at the event caused me to feel that way. As I think about Hudson’s description of the Meissner field (aura) it made sense that she would separate herself from the crowd. Anyone within her aura would interfere with her attempt to target me. While she was standing by herself she could then focus on my mind and thoughts in order to project the feeling of malevolence toward me. It worked. I wonder how many others were targeted that day. I am impressed to say the least. I am also fascinated by these encounters I have with them. It is clear that they do not want me around, but I refuse to allow them to control me any more than they already do. The more experiences that I have with them the more I begin to understand what they are capable of. Later that night I did feel some pressure in my chest, but I can’t be sure if it was from my earlier encounter. With the amount of radiation that they have been hitting me with lately I can’t be certain what caused it.
    I do not present a threat to them other than sharing my experiences with anyone interested. The more they attack and continue the surveillance, the more I have to tell. They are turning up the heat on me. They are targeting my head again. The radiation from their technology is a nuisance, but not enough to stop me. I’ll keep posting here as this continues.
    Someone sent me a lot of love last night. Whoever you are I am very grateful. It is nice to feel that there is someone or something out there that is watching over me.

Posts from original blog www.i-am-xam.com/blog.html. 


05.13.11 – Yesterday I was lost in a sea of negative thoughts. The utter futility of my current circumstances was overwhelming. I could not shake it from my mind. I watched as my will was being whittled down to nothing. I was the observer, and I knew that something was wrong with the way I was feeling. I thought to write what I was feeling in my journal. The negativity came on so suddenly that I could not understand why I was feeling that way. The Nameless must be influencing me in some way again. I wrote in the journal that these thoughts were not my own so they must be placing these thoughts in my head or they have again been able to enter my home and put drugs in my food. I wondered if they were trying to make me commit suicide, but the thought of suicide is such an awful thing to me. As soon as I finished my entry in the journal, I could feel the negativity begin to subside. I went out to do some errands and the negativity was gone. The have me completely enclosed. I am surrounded by them in almost every aspect of my life. It is both fascinating and also very daunting.
    If I have not replied to your email it is because I have not received it. They have intercepted my email in the past I believe they may be doing this again with this site. I am open to answering any questions that any of you have. Please be persistent…


05.14.11 – I was again the victim of what I am calling psychic attacks. I believe the perpetrator was a lady medium height and build with dark hair and a dark sunglasses. I noticed her staring at me before I entered a health food store, but I did not see her in the store. When I exited the store I saw that she was seated outside with an older man. As I stood on the sidewalk she passed behind me. It looked like she was in a hurry. What I thought was interesting, the older man she was sharing a table with looked a little puzzled. I assume that she just got up and left him sitting there. I am getting used to these kinds of attacks. Most of the time I feel only minor effects, thanks to the energy emitted by the device.
    White powdered gold has the ability to allow the user to hear the thoughts of others. David Hudson states that it is caused by the Meissner field of superconductors. He states that the aura is the Meissner field in the human body. Everyone has small amounts of superconducting material (rhodium, iridium) in their bodies most of it is concentrated in the brain. The Meissner field of a white powdered gold user is enhanced. Anyone within the field of the user is susceptible to having their thoughts heard. This would also enable the person to place thoughts in someone else’s mind. I do not know exactly how the lady, or many of my other attackers, are able to induce the pressure in my heart. Whether they use their thoughts or some other technique is not known to me. But, they must get close enough to me in order to attack. The auras (Meissner fields) of the attacker and the victim must overlap in order for the attack to be successful. Most of the attackers have been about arms length away from me. I can place the attacker at every incident. Those with the ability to use this attack must have high energy levels or auras. I have an ability to sense those types of people in my conscious cloud even before I started to use white powdered gold. I will remember her if I see her again. I seem to be able to remember all of the faces of my attackers for some reason.
    Amendment: The lady I mentioned above looked familiar to me. I remember seeing her with another member of the group I call the Nameless when they were looking for me one day after I snuck out the back exit of my apartment building in late February 2011 (mentioned in the book). I see you…

Posts from original blog www.i-am-xam.com/blog.html 


05.08.11 – The surveillance continues. They have created a buffer zone between me and the rest of the world it seems. They continue to monitor me and keep tract of anyone I may have contact with. It has gotten to the point that I watch them watch me, and yet I still do not know why they do this. What are they afraid of? Are they doing this to prevent me from contacting someone who knows what is going on?


05.09.11 – The are still using their technology to lower my energy levels. The device seems to be the only way I can keep the radiation, or whatever they are using on me, from depleting my energy. The energy from the device helps get rid of the numbness and tingling sensation from the radiation. The device is the only way I can find relief. I can see positive changes in my conscious cloud when I use the device, but I’m still stuck in limbo.


05.10.11 – The subconscious architect of my conscious cloud is letting me know what actions are necessary. The positive changes are slowly being manifested. The environment of my mind within the construct of my meditation is also changing. I no longer need to focus on anything in particular. I just set my mind adrift and the stillness comes over me.


05.11.11 – I took a double dose of white powdered gold this morning. Their response was an extra heavy concentration of radiation for most of the day. This is evidence that they can sense my energy levels. They know when I start begin to reach a point where I might be able to ascend or hear the thoughts of others again. I’m back in the mode of replacing what they take away. If it was not for the device this would not be possible. This is what it has come to since they have stopped trying to induce a heart attack with their psychic abilities.


05.12.11 – Those that I call the Nameless did not like my last post. The comment about the heart attack brought about an increase in the radiation they expose me to on a daily basis. When I was writing the book they would always increase the radiation whenever I would write about some of the negative things they have done to me. Since I am still captive in my current set of circumstances they have the ability to punish me whenever I do something that they do not like. They are attempting to train me to behave. I have never really responded well to that sort of conditioning. It is also the reason for my current condition, I am and will forever be defiant.

Post from original blog www.i-am-xam.com/blog.html.


04.30.11 – As mentioned in the book in the section Device 2.0, this crude Joe-Cell experiment was the first time I was able to get the Joe-Cell to the first stage. The Joe-Cell was made hastily with aluminum foil lined plastic cylinders from some plastic bottles. 8 – 1.5 volt batteries in a series were used to supply the power (approx. 12 v). Filtered tap water was added and the voltage was applied with no reaction. As soon as the device was placed near the Joe-Cell an immediate reaction started, as indicated by the white bubbles and foam. There is a relationship between the two devices that should be explored by more qualified people.
    The device is a tool that will emit aetheric energy via two bucking magnets. A simplified version would consist of two neodymium bar magnets with opposing poles strapped together. A xenon flash tube is then placed near the field where the two magnets meet. The energy emitted from the magnets and xenon bulb is what energizes the water in the Joe-Cell.