Category: consciousness

A Simulated Reality

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Buzzards fleeing after feeding on a carcass as I approach…

Pertaining to this simulation, one of the first questions I have asked has to do with why or the purpose of the simulation. Sadly, I do not have an answer to that question at this time and I may never find an answer. I cannot fallback on some new age rational, it is the utter complexity of the simulation itself that makes understanding it purpose futile. Regardless of the futility of my quest, I am interested in obtaining a better understanding of the simulation.

It is difficult to describe and define what I want to accomplish. My past and ongoing experiences compel me to better understand those experiences. Nothing makes sense anymore. The foundation in which I base my concept of reality has shifted. My inherited paradigm is no longer valid and I question my experiences as well as my own frame of reference. I have woken up to the fact that everything I know is fiction. Now what? Try to throw out everything you have inherited a start with something new?

I am moving toward a concept of conscious simulation. A simulation where there are no deities. A simulation where I have the ability to interact, interfere, manifest and navigate within its physical reality and beyond its boundaries.

Consciousness

What about consciousness? Where does consciousness fit into the framework of a simulation? I am beginning to think that consciousness is the simulation, the framework or operating system.

Where is the simulation executing? Could the simulation be executing in the human mind? Could each sentient being running a unique simulation that is collectively expressed as our shared reality. The phrase “it is all in your mind” could not be more correct in this case.

Running a unique simulation is what we do when we dream and even in our dream state we share similar experiences with people in similar social constructs. What are dreams? Do they connect us to another level of consciousness? Our brain is not always capable of differentiating between dreams and our conscious reality. My experiences confirm that dreams are connected to our daily conscious reality. Dreams could very well be portals to other levels of consciousness (parallel existences). Electromagnetic radiation alters my dream experiences. When I wake up from a negative dream or one where the experience is one of poverty and struggle I can feel the effects of a strong electromagnetic radiation weapon. Are dreams being used to alter my perceptions or behavior in my conscious waking reality?

Consciousness must be executing outside of our mind also. Our natural world is a physical manifestation of consciousness. Everything within consciousness is conscious. Every single element and atom is conscious. If something is not conscious it cannot exist within consciousness (I will try to prove this statement). Consciousness is infinite in depth and in constant state of change. Consciousness has infinite levels where infinite possibilities can exist. Is the human mind our conscious interface to consciousness?

HuMind

The human mind. What is its purpose? Could the human mind be an interface to our simulated world. Is the human mind a means of accessing the simulation like our digital devices access the internet? When we alter the mind then we can alter our experience, but what is altered? Are our perceptions altered? Is consciousness altered? Do our altered perceptions alter consciousness?

Altered states can be induced by the use of drugs as well as electrical, audio and visual stimulation. There is also the use of ORMUS (Orbitally Rearranged Monatomic Element or M-state element). ORMUS alter, change or induce the energy state of a biological organism. The energy or life force of the biological organism altered by ORMUS is heightened and attracts similar energy to the biological organism. I have used ingested “white powdered gold” crafted by a company formerly called ASC-Alchemy a truly permanently transformative process. Thank you Rose…

A device I use daily produces biologically beneficial energy. I could not have survived without the use of my updated devices. They provide me with enough energy to nullify the negative electromagnetic energy that is directed toward me on a daily and nightly basis. The energy alters and enhances the mind in interesting ways and may be responsible for my current perceptions I now describe.

Psychedelic drugs can remove filtering mechanisms in the mind and expand the mind’s frame of reference. Psychedelics are abundant in the natural physical manifestation of consciousness. They have been used by humanity to understand and navigate our conscious experiences. Their use fosters leaps in human evolution and even our technological advances have been affected by psychedelics. There are reason why the use of psychedelics are illegal in most countries. Most of those reasons come from those that benefit from banning their use.

In my experiences the mind can be disrupted or enhanced which brings about degraded (limited) or upgraded (unlimited) experiences. I have experienced the uncanny access to information that I call ‘knowing’. It is simply receiving answers or information. Answers spill out of consciousness when needed. Answers that did not involve standard cognition or even intuition. These times of clarity have been brief, sometimes only lasting a day. Most of the time when I am in a state of clarity it is often disrupted by electromagnetic radiation.

Ultimately the human mind is a gateway without a firewall. Anyone can access your mind and alter your experiences. American advertising is a prime example of how audio and visual stimulation can alter a person’s behavior. My experiences indicate that there is an active organization within my level of consciousness that uses technology, drugs, chemicals and intimidation to induce fear in order to lower life force energy in order to alter your mind in order to control behavior. Pretty scary shit when you are unaware of what is being done to you.

Oh My God

A simulation is an easier concept to work with than an organized system of beliefs (aka the R word). A simulation better explains this reality because it is rooted in what can be sensed. In order for a simulation to be properly understood it must do so in the absence of deifying that which we do not understand. If there is no higher power then we are forced to figure out the cause. 80-90 percent of the population has or does believe in a higher power or deity for thousands of years and yet we seem to be on the verge of a war between the followers of those deities.

I have experienced orbs illuminating my bedroom as they passed through and have caught them on video surveillance equipment around my home. What are they? Are they conscious beings from other levels of consciousness? Do they exist to us as orbs of energy because we are very limited by our senses (limited visible light spectrum, limited audio 20-20K Hz) and ultimately limited by our frame of reference. 

I have experienced walking past a person or being that my mind had difficulty interpreting. It is a very uncomfortable experience when your mind struggles to frame visual information with a limited database of stored imagery. My immediate reaction was extra-terrestrial, but that may not be the cause. Extra-conscious beings may better explain what I experienced. 

Most of what I experienced in Hawaii was just a group of people using technology to scare the crap out of me. It worked. I was asking aliens and deities for help every minute of the day. Today, I a bit older and more wise. My last experience with energy sapping technology came from a beat up late model green van parked across the street from my home. The weapon was operated by a portly man in his forties. He was hardly a higher power and he was definitely not an extraterrestrial from what I could see. These attacks are now a rare occurrence because they are ineffective. They are ineffective because they are not viewed as magic, a higher power or alien. 

I have encountered people that can put the fear of God into me, a very uncomfortable fight or flight response. I have also experienced people that are able to stop or stall the flow of energy through my biological energy meridiums. These attacks can momentarily feel like a heart attack. How is this done? How can they read my mind and alter my emotional state? I have encountered some very talented people capable of inflicting harm without touching me. Are they demons or angels? Probably not. They are willing to kill to protect something. What are they protecting?

One thing is certain they are not deities. They are humans acting inhumane, and unfortunately there seem to be a lot of them.

The Real Secret

This simulated reality is constantly vying for our attention. One possible purpose of the simulation could be to provide for us within this existence. For those that are aware of this it is a beneficial relationship. For those that are unaware it creates a simulated reality that resembles a prison for indentured slaves; similar to our current human condition. To this day I have never encountered a person or being of extremely high life energy that was destitute. Most of them were middle class or wealthy. They are talented artists, athletes and professionals. There is something called “the real secret” and it is being selectively shared and used to exploit others; the majority of others. Have you ever tried to live by the philosophies of “The Secret”? How’s that working out for you? Okay? Kind of? Not so well?

This simulated reality has been filled with distractions on every level hoping to keep you occupied and focused on something else. Those people that surveil me once yelled from a passing car, “you could have had anything you wanted”. They did not understand that they do not possess anything that I want. After exiting the void and entering this conscious reality I was on my way to becoming one of them. But, I quickly found out that I could not relate to them and did not want anything to do with them. Within their organization nothing is free, everything comes with some kind of cost. There is a definite hierarchy with a lot of them stepping on others to get to the top.

I want to ascend to a higher state of consciousness and remain there. No one can give that to me. They are beginning to understand that no one can control access to higher consciousness indefinitely. I have already experienced it. I am just unable to maintain it when I am able to achieve it. That is changing too. Everything is in a constant state of change and that is the nature of the conscious simulated reality and it is a very good thing.

Me, me, me…

What is my role in this? I haven’t a clue. I know that there is a good deal of attention in the surveillance of my whereabouts. When I encounter a person or being of higher life energy they take a step back and become very angry; as with brief encounter with a man in the parking lot of Simplay Labs in Sunnyvale California – he was livid. Or they become afraid as if I was going to harm them.

My most recent experience happened at a bank. The woman in front of me was a person of high life force and I could feel it. She became aware of my presence and the usual experience unfolded. We were wired or connected and the feeling of my thoughts not being my own was a point of focus. She conducted her business and then left. When I left there was a police officer parked partially on the median of the road just outside the Bank. I have experienced this in past encounters as well as a swarm of their minions running interference. This usually prompts a WTF reaction. Followed by a why are they so afraid of me?

I have seen higher life force people scatter as I walked through Half Moon Bay California downtown area, stop and quickly turn around and quickly walk away as I walked toward them on the sidewalk at Santana Row in San Jose California, or turn around while cycling on a mountain road after I pass by on my bicycle. Why? I believe the answer lies within the framework of the simulation. I’ll let you know when I receive an answer.

The Silence

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The Silence is a song that resonates in a perpetual manner within me now.

In the past I spoke of a golden seed growing within me. It seems I have been swept up into the tail of a comet, caught within its trailing vortex. The song seems to embody the blissful helplessness of this wondrous experience.

I have opened up my heart and surrendered to the whole of consciousness fully. I now know what samadhi means.

As it has happened in the past the silence washes over me without warning. I sense it in the background, an ever present stillness. I can no longer differentiate between inner and outer realms of the self.

While sitting and creating my day this morning my thoughts just stopped. I found myself in a meditative state that lasted about three hours or more (I can only approximate the passage of time).

I am experiencing a new sensation. I do not seem to be moving though life, but life (this conscious reality) seems to be  moving towards me as I surrender to the stillness within me.

Is this what they have tried to prevent from happening? What used to be so difficult seem effortless now. I cannot tell if they were real or the manifestation of my conscious ego. Not so important now.

Blessings to all who have read this.

Extraordinary Contentment

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As you may have noticed that I have not been updating this blog on a regular basis. I really do not wish to engage or reinforce a malformed conscious reality. My focus, now, is to recreate my conscious reality with a more desirable and beneficial construct. 

What prompted this entry was a realization that most of what I feel emotionally is false except for what should only be described as fundamental conscious constant. Out of all the emotions that are possible, contentment is the one emotion that should be allowed to dominate the moments of our lives. I say this because if you allow contentment to become the constant in your life consciousness will respond.
Negative thoughts and emotional responses are in absence of contentment. I have realized that I have unconsciously allowed negative thoughts to enter my mind, so to speak. I allow this to happen when I am not focused upon contentment and being conscious, or attentive. I guess today was the first time I realized I was floating on a raft of negativity upon an ocean of contentment. 
Time to dive in… 

Email Account Access Problems

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The Prevention of Ascension – www.i-am-xam.com

Daily Journal

I have been experiencing problems accessing my email associated with xam@i-am-xam.com. Please use this forum to contact me. Even the comments on this blog can be deleted by my gang stalking friends. Please be patient and persistent. Will turn off moderation so comments will post immediately.

I will find other means of being contacted. I will join other forums and start posting conversations here. Let’s find out what they are capable of, shall we. 
Not just casual stalking going on with me. Seems like the have some technical assistance from some crafty hackers. 
Stay tuned…
If all activity from me ends, the they won. I’ll be helping from the other side. Stay strong. 

"Forgive them for they do not know what they do"

~ 3maxxxam3 ~ 1 Comment
http://iamxam.blogspot.com/2012/01/030111-transfered-from-original-blog.html

The Prevention of Ascension – www.i-am-xam.com

Daily Journal

This is might be a valid reason for all that I am experiencing. I will have to take a look at what Carissa Conti has to say about my experiences and possibly be prepared for what might still be coming.

I have asked for guidance and it seems to have arrived. I did not expect it in this form and noting the date of Herr A’s comment it was presented to me almost a year ago. Obviously, I was not ready to hear nor heed its message. I will do some reading and research to see if this is what I am experiencing.

What lead to this has been noted in my Daily Journal. The strange and menacing behavior may be explained by the above comment. The character of these people are animated similar to a cartoon charter. Possession? I don’t know if I am now influenced by the comment, but it kind of makes sense.

More on this on the next post…

Magicians, Deities and Consciousness

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Call of Duty

The Prevention of Ascension – www.i-am-xam.com

Daily Journal

Landing a helicopter in the early 1800s to talk to and help the citizenry with the knowledge and technology of our time would seem magical or downright godly.

The first time the Nameless used their technology on me I thought I was dying. They used their technology on me on a canyon road in Topanga CA. possibly hoping I would pass out and veer off of the steep clifs on that road. It happened again and after I made it home safely I made a farewell video for my then wife and family. The two instances caused me to think I was having a heart attack. Interesting since I was running from Topanga to Pacific Palisades on the trails of the Topanga Wildlife Preserve at least three times a week. I needed to be pretty fit to run the hills on those trails.
The next time I was hit by their E.M. beam I was in Hawaii. It was the climax of my escalating relationship with these people or beings. I remembered how the first two attacks felt and I knew I wasn’t  having a heart attack, I knew they were doing it to me. On the day of a series of attacks I was telling them to fuck off and goading them to try and take me down. I moved from room to room trying to avoid the beam. I could feel the energy dissipate when I left one room and then build as it tracked me into another room in my apartment. I did not leave the apartment because I was afraid that I would lose consciousness in the hallway or elevator. The prospect that they might have been waiting on me to leave was also heavy on my mind. I ended the first evening wrapped in wet towels in the middle of my apartment in the fetal position. 
The next night it started again. Not knowing what was happening I began to apologized and begged for them to forgive me. I thought that some kind of UFO or aircraft from some powerful alien race was punishing me.I thought their ship was hovering above the apartment targeting me with another barrage from their death ray, Gods sent to claim my soul. As the attacks continued I was able to fend them off with aluminum foil and then a hastily and loosely constructed Faraday cage out of cardboard and foil grounded to the plumbing under the kitchen sink. I started to be able to discern where the beams originated from as the altered the position of the weapon to exploit the weakness of the faraday cage. Most of the remainder of the attacks where from a building adjacent to my apartment building and from the apartments above and below my own. Needless to say that what I once thought were Gods were just the acts of petty humans. The great Wizard of Oz was revealed to be a group of people living, or stationed, at my apartment complex. The journal of those attacks is located at the end of my ebook.
The last time they used their weapon on me while driving I pulled off the highway and moved amoung other drivers in close proximity. A few hazardous maneuvers placed me back on the highway without feeling the weapon again. I knew that the weapon was being used from one of the vehicles near me. It wasn’t from an aircraft of any kind. They continue to use the weapon on my at my current residence, but since I am aware of them and their tactics it no longer frightens me. I know that they do so because I have reached a level of energy or life force that allows me to ascend to a higher state of consciousness. I know they just want to put me back in my place.

Today they resumed the attacks, but they were not as effective as they hoped. The EM field can be felt, but it is not as debilitating as it once was. I do not know if I am becoming immune or if I am being protected by some other source, but today was mild compared to the others. I went to the office of my appointment and the minions were just leaving, as they always do, casting a glance in my direction with the look of disdain and defeat.

It is not magic. It is not godly. It is not the behavior of some ascended being from another world. It is the behavior of humans that have acquired technology and use it to subjugate others to maintain power and control over others. It is the same behavior we have seen time and time again throughout our history. It is an unfortunate characteristic of people that have lost their sense of humanity and their respect for themselves and others. They do so without conscience and it can nolonger be tolerated by consciousness as a whole. Petty humans need to leave the magic to the real gods.
Magic

Is there such a thing? If someone was able to levitate or move over vast distances with a thought, would that be magical? Are we capable of such things? I have a feeling that we have always possessed these abilities, but they have been purposely hidden from us at this level of consciousness. Could you imagine this reality full of people floating around and poping from place to place. Supernatural abilities in the hands of a populace with our kind of maturity would be interesting to say the least. Should these abilities be purposefully hidden or obfuscated.

Are we not capable learning to use these abilities as any other ability. What about the simple act of walking. We did not just spring to our feet straight out of the womb. We learned to do so over time, both as a species (if you believe in evolution) and during our lives. Are we not capable of learning to use and respect our known and unknown abilities as we evolve and progress? Is this the reason why we are here in this realm? Are we too primitive to handle these so called supernatural talents that the Nameless use to exploit us on a daily basis?

Magic is just a word that describes things we are not capable of understanding or have not yet been able to understand. Consciousness is mysterious and magical because we are unable to interpret what consciousness itself is showing us. Consciousness uses this to invite us to take a closer look so that we may discover all it has to offer. Science has discovered the quantum weirdness of the universe. Things that do not make sense are usually written off or made out to be some sort of universal constant with some mathematical value. It may just turn out to be that consciousness cannot be explained with numbers and formulas, it may turn out to be far to dynamic and intrinsic to consciousness itself to warrant an explanation.

I have been reminded of Carlos Casteneda. His work has been dismissed as fiction. Much like my story has been dismissed as delusion. The greatest story ever told has garnered millions of followers. Why has it been so easy to believe in a story about magical events that had happened thousands of years ago but when someone talks about the experience of some magical or supernatural events in their life they are simply explained away as an act of God or dissmissed as lies or delusions? We have been conditioned to react this way. We have forgotten to look for the mystery in life. We have lost contact with consciousness and the magic and wonder held therein. Consciousness is trying to get our attention to the all the wonder, mystery and magic that it is willing to provide us. All we have to do is break from our inherited delusions. The easiest way to do this is with psychedelics. Psychedelics are an important part of our consciousness or they would not exist within it.

My Waking Dream

The Nameless are beginning to be more overt. They are antagonizing and provoking me. Standing in front of my home (female Mexican witches with their male handlers – they always come in pairs), driving slowly in front of me on my bike rides (typical minion thug), flipping me off on the highway (caucasian male in a blue BMW Z4), making faces at me when they drive by while I am riding my bike on congested roadways (goofy looking male of Asian descent). They are even sending their adolescent spawn out to provoke me (I have always wondered about the nature of the spawn of the Nameless and bullying in schools – as well as violent retaliation from others in events such as the infamous Columbine Massacre).

I no longer react because I view them the same as when I see them in my sleeping dreams. The menacing characters can do nothing if they are unable to incite a reaction. I am lucid in my waking dream and just view them, avoid them and laugh. This childish behavior is very odd, but it reveals that they are as petty as I have always stated. They have come to their wits end and the true nature of their character is coming to the fore; childish petty demons of myth and folklore. The oddity of our sleeping dreamworld is usually recognized just before we wake up. I am hoping that these odd experiences are an indication that I am close to my eventual awakening.

It may very well turn out to be that I am not insane, I am just starting to view this reality as the insanely delusional world it actually is. What does that say about an insane person that starts to view normal people as insane? The more I witness this kind of behavior the more contentment I find within my own conscious reality. This is truly a mind fuck…

NOTE: I must apologize for the hastily written entry riddled with errors and typos. I did not have time to reread the post at the time ts was posted. I hope that I have corrected most of the errors. Much is starting to happen. I try to post as soon as I experience them.

Our Wireless World

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2Gig Technologies

The Prevention of Ascension – www.i-am-xam.com

Daily Journal

I mentioned in an earlier post that a new home security company has taken over the security at my current residence. I was not involved with the transaction. The company is named Security Networks and is based out of Florida. The company has a poor reputation and is somewhat of a predator. Their sales people comb the neighborhoods looking for ADT signs and then use pressure sales techniques and fear mongering to persuade the homeowner to sign up with their company. The salesperson sweetened the deal with security system accessories that were overpriced. One item was marked up 200%. The kicker is that the homeowner signed up for 60 months (5 years) and the contract renews automatically for another 5 years until it is canceled.

The new system that was installed is a cellular system. The system does no require a landline (hardline telco twisted pair). In the event of an alarm the system will contact the service provider via the cellular network. Since it was installed I did not notice any adverse symptoms from any of the components. Yesterday I did begin to feel a little strange (after the three day cancelation period ended). I started to have problems thinking when I was near the device. The light headed feeling was something that I experienced before. It took me some times to figure it out, but I remembered what had caused this before.

While I was in Hawaii I used a cellular internet provider that used a modem you could take anywhere. The company, I believe, is now called Clear. When I installed the modem at home I started to feel similar to what I am currently feeling, difficulty thinking, lightheaded, central nervous system stimulation (agitation). I had signed a contract for a year and kept the service for a year and the switched to Hawaiiantel’s DSL. The week after canceling the cellular internet service I felt better and most of the symptoms subsided (prior to my life’s deterioration when the Nameless started attacking me).

Light Headed and Negative

Last night and for most of the day I have been fighting off negative thoughts. I have been feeling sad and despondent. I know that these feeling can creek up now and again, but this time they were persistent. The general feeling of despair continues to grow while I am at home. My mind is awash with these feelings, but when I am away from the security cellular modem I have a more positive state of mind.

The device pictured above is GSM cellular transceiver. More powerful than the cell phone used by consumers because it is considered a home appliance by the F.C.C. The interesting thing is that the signal strength varies during the day and at the time of posting this entry it is fairly high.

Are the Nameless behind this (the first salesperson I chased away had the characteristics of one of them), they are suspect. I cannot be sure at this time, but one thing I am sure of is the cellular device is detrimental to my health and wellbeing. I am sensitive to EM fields. I can find most commercial wireless routers in a building with my eyes closed. I can feel the change in clarity of my mind as if I just drank a glass of wine or beer.

What is particularly menacing is the change in attitude. I am constantly monitoring my thoughts (a habit gained from meditation). When my thoughts become negative I seek a reason or source for the negative thoughts. Past posts have noted how I have been overcome with negative emotions and once I recognize them for what they are I am able to dismiss them. I can recognize negative thoughts of a certain type as coming from and external source. The Nameless have an ability to influence the minds of others, I have experienced this first hand while talking to some of them. I had that feeling of “why did I agree to that” after the conversation or meeting ended (a significant experience was while I was talking to some union reps while working for the state of Hawaii – all state employees must join one of two unions).

Technology’s Negativity

Technology can be a godsend, but it also poses risks. Our wireless networks grant us access to communication and internet, but they do pose risks to the electrical system of the body (human biology is electrical) and mind (central nervous system). Exposure to this technology may not cause illness, but can disrupt the conscious subconscious connection, disrupt dreaming, disrupt brainwave patterns or sustain a particular brainwave pattern. If the cellular device is sustaining a heightened state of alert as when a person is confronted with a fight or flight situation it can alter the body’s chemistry (cortisol, norepinephrine) and cause anxiety, paranoia, depression and hypertension. Depression and hypertension are at epidemic proportions in large cities (Los Angeles, New York) with large and often redundant cell networks providing phone service. Sadly we are being conditioned to accept these symptoms as being common and normal health conditions.

It is interesting that I find contentment in natural places where cell phone towers are absent. No bars, no carrier on the cell phone is an indication of a cell free area. I can refresh my connection with the greater consciousness spending time in natural rural areas. At this time I feel disconnected from the whole of consciousness. For someone that has spent a lot of time cultivating a connection with the whole of consciousness, it feels like being isolated from a source of love and contentment.

How will my current dilemma be remedied? Turning the security system off when at home. Since I am unable to remove the device I will need to relocate and/or shield the device. I will post my final solution here.

We should all limit the exposure to the cellular microwave spectrum in our homes. Turn off your 900 MHz wireless DSL modems, routers and cellular hotspots when not in use. Use the hardline. Wireless networks are not even close to the speed of copper. Wireless saturation of your living space could be similar to the lead pipes the Romans used to provide water in their homes. The wireless luxury could be our end.

Daily Journal

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I have placed my online journal on Google Docs. The journal can be viewed here for anyone interested in following my madness a bit more intimately.
 – https://docs.google.com/document/d/1vRTnAF4oonh_EgKe6-Qm9pq563T94zXqSFRjtuLV3TA/edit?usp=sharing –

I am getting into the habit of updating my journal via my iPhone during the day. Most of the thoughts are the inspiration for a blog post here. I do this mainly to track my progress or my mental decline. We’ll see how this goes.

The Others

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a21db-img_7483.jpgThere has been some activity from those I call The Others. I have no idea what their agenda may be. I started to see them in the places I usually go since I started to resume posting on this blog. They are friendly and usually reach out to me in some way. I am unable to discern them from the Nameless on most occasions since I am in a constant state of mistrust.

I encountered one of them in a Mall (another prior to this event in a local hardware store), but perceived them as one of the Nameless. I was in an altered state of mind that day. I felt a little light headed and agitated. This feeling subsided once I returned home. I cannot be sure if the Nameless were responsible for this feeling, but it did serve to alter my perception of the ‘Other’ person that was sitting nearby (the details of my encounter is intentionally vague to protect  the identity of the person I saw – not understanding their relationship with the Nameless).

They look as if they took certain positive physical characteristics from other people and manifested those physical characteristics in their own body. Or, I am unable to view them as they really are, due to my mind’s limited frame of reference. It is difficult to explain what I see and interpret. There is something distinct about their appearance that is difficult to to understand.

I had noticed them in Hawaii before I moved to California, but I was in a state of survival and fear at that time. I could not welcome anyone into my life after recently experiencing the onslaught from the Nameless thugs. I can still see their faces and what they were wearing on that day near the health food store near S. King and University Ave. I could see the compassion in their eyes. Intention and emotion conveyed by the eyes cannot be faked. I am sorry I missed that opportunity.

I do not know if they are trying to help me or if they are being entertained, by my actions or delusional state of mind. I thought that it might be necessary to post this encounter just in case they are reading this blog (I feel insane, right now, completely insane…). I need to convey to them that I am aware of their efforts, but require a level of assurance of their intentions.

NOTE: This post was published mysteriously. I had not intention of publishing this post yet. For those of you that visit this blog regularly (thank you), you noticed that this initially was a partial draft.

Life is But A Dream

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Seven pointed star that jumped out at me while channel surfing – Game of Thrones
A sacred symbol in Wicca and Alchemy – Sacred Geometry

The Prevention of Ascension – www.i-am-xam.com

Daily Journal

I am shifting between levels of consciousness. I have mentioned this before, but these shifts are no longer subtle or easy to dismiss. I witness events and then the following day(s) I am unable to verify that they actually happened. I ask a person involved in the event about an event and they stated that they did’t know what I am talking about. Or, I have an experience I cannot physically verify the following days. This could be a sign of my increased insanity, my life would be easier if I was, but the fact that I am aware of this and attentive to these experiences is a good sign. My interest is how I may be able to use or integrate this quantum weirdness and its meaning? I am experimenting with my life consciously, some may say recklessly, since I believe that I have nothing to lose. After all, sanity is actually an agreed upon acceptable level of behavior set by a society that is far from sane.

Dreams have taken on a realistic character and I wonder if I am dreaming these instances where and I am unable to verify them when I am awake. This could possibly be the merging of my conscious and subconscious mind. Sleep seems to be some kind of interrupt between levels of consciousness or the conscious and subconscious. Waking up day to day is no longer the same mundane experience, each day is different, as if I have more choices (increased ability to manifest and create my reality). If I fall asleep during the day (nap) I can sense that something has changed after I wake up. It is not always clear to me what has changed, but I notice a change in what I focus upon. This has increased as I devote more tim and consistency to meditation. My meditation sessions have changed with greater focus, purpose and ease.
I seem to be entering a change in my life. It is very similar to dreaming. I am observing my waking life as if I am dreaming. The best way to describe this is to say I am detached from it as if I was part of the audience. I am caught between simultaneously participating and observing in this dream of my life. It is a strange feeling, but also comfortable in that it feels right, almost normal.

Nature responds to me. I sit in a parking lot waiting for an appointment and I am overcome with contentment. I feel compelled to look at a nearby tree and as I focus my gaze upon the tree I notice that it is shimmering in the sun light. It feels like I am picking up the vibration and resonating with it. The contentment grows and I thank the tree (nature) for the experience.

There is a large hill that I pass by on a certain road while cycling. The hill has a certain vibration or energy about it. I stop and take time to soak up this energy. As I focus my gaze upon the hillside I feel the contentment that I feel while in nature, something I have experienced in the past while living near the Santa Cruz mountain range. There is a strange feeling that a doorway or portal is opening, as if I was being invited. I don’t know if it is a feeling or just a desire, my desire to escape this reality.

I am starting to believe that nature is the physical manifestation of consciousness. This is difficult to explain. When we dream while sleeping we create a construct in order for us to interact with the dream. There are the basic characteristics in order for us to function, ground, light, tactile senses, sound, etc. While we are awake, nature is the same thing. Nature is the physical aspect of the dream, but it is conscious and interactive  when presented with the correct state of mind.

The Nameless seem to be aware of this change and have been active in suppressing this change with their electromagnetic radiation. One thing I did notice is that I am recovering faster. The latest volley of radiation was at the levels of when I lived in Hawaii. Just recently the satellite TV signal dropped at the onset of the attack. I was almost incapacitated, but never an ounce of fear entered my mind. I just entered my faraday cage and fell asleep. The following day I usually feel fatigued, but I rode to Grant Ranch taking Quimby Rd. back home, not an easy task. 
Skipping

There are days when the Nameless do not interfere with my life. They are not present. Their slaves are not overt in their activities. My life is normal (whatever that means). There are also days when I feel I have ascended to a higher state of consciousness, life is crisp, clean, smooth and flowing. I see some of the Nameless (we are attracted to one another). I interact with them and then they notice something about me that is different. Fear and surprise is usually the response I get and they watch me closely until either party leaves. The following day I notice a change (as noted above – shifting levels of consciousness) and the level of radiation is higher as if I was a flame that they were trying to extinguish. I then notice that I am back at a familiar level one that is full of their slaves and absent of those with higher levels of consciousness, dark and dreary. I feel like a stone skipping across a lake. Sometimes I can sustain the skip, sometimes I sink.
Lucid

My current experiments concern my vulnerability when I am asleep. They have been successful in influencing me while I sleep. Since I have been making changes in where I sleep I have been waking up refreshed without a depressed state of mind. I seem to be able to protect myself from most of their effort to influence my waking dream state. Consciousness seems to be more malleable than I thought possible. Once you begin an awakened relationship with consciousness, consciousness responds. Being attentive and patient during my waking state is necessary to witness all that consciousness is conveying. Things pop out and others fade into the background. Consciousness communicates directly in this manner once it has your attention it will stream a series of events together. I am not too adept in interpretation at this time, but I am learning.

Images, stories, articles, people, locations jump out at me. I can search for  something online and be lead to a specific site with a subject that is too compelling to ignore. If I do ignore it, I find myself back at the site. The little television I watch I end up catching the same movie at the same scene until I acknowledge the message (or what I believe to be the message). It’s actually pretty annoying until I figure out the message. I have recently come to understand that people who are clairvoyant have these experiences. I don’t consider myself to be clairvoyant.

https://youtube.googleapis.com/v/LcbCafpvIT0&source=uds

NOTE: One of the things that popped out was a video on extraterrestrial disclosure. I have no evidence that extraterrestrials exist and I have never seen one. I perceive The Nameless to be human with a higher state of consciousness. Many of their malevolence and petty characteristics are evidence of their humanity. I have not seen any evidence that they are highly evolved, if so they would not be malevolent.

When malevolence is part of the social construct of a society you get this reality (poverty, war, suffering). When benevolence is the only paradigm within a social construct the possibilities are endless. The conscious trajectories of each social construct completely differ in speed (evolution) and direction (purpose) that they may never cross paths in the infinite space within the whole of consciousness. 

I am skeptical all of UFO’s (this will persist until I see one myself), although I did claim in my ebook that the initial attacks were from some kind of aerial vehicle. Other beings on other planets and levels of consciousness is something that I believe, but have no evidence to support this, yet.
What is the message in this video? I don’t know yet. I’ll try and post these pop out messages from my conscious experiences here so you can help me interpret what might be happening.

Chess Match

The game I am playing with the Nameless gets a little to intense at times. I get caught up (distracted) with them and lose sight of what I intend to accomplish (ascend beyond their kind). The previous post was an indication of this. I was provoking them and they were responding. As things escalated I needed to take a step back and assess how my thoughts and actions were effecting my reality (my attention to them retains them within my conscious reality). I am back at it again (posting and provoking), so the Nameless need to call their spook to gas up that motorcycle and follow me on my bike rides up the mountain again. It is interesting how they are able to introduce characters into my waking dreamworld and effect my actions and thoughts, fascinating to say the least…

Hacked

~ 3maxxxam3 ~ Leave a comment

Been working on reestablishing some accounts associated with my sites. It looks like my Facebook site as well as the site I use for http://www.i-am-xam.com’s email has been infiltrated. No known damage, but I could have lost some email from the past few weeks, after I started posting again. This is the second time this has happened, that I know of. I must be doing something right.

If you attempted to contact me and received a reply send it again, it might not have been me. If you did not get a reply from a previous email, send it again also.

Powerball

~ 3maxxxam3 ~ Leave a comment

The Prevention of Ascension – www.i-am-xam.com

I have a secret that I have been avoiding to post. When I first arrived back in California I had an urge to test the law of attraction, or manifesting my thoughts and desires in my reality through conscious intent. When I would go to purchase a ticket the Nameless were not to far behind. I assumed that they did not want a person like me playing the lottery in California because if I won they would have a problem controlling me. I have plans to travel and stay mobile to make it difficult for them to try to control and influence me.

The interesting part of this observation is that as soon as I purchased a ticket one of their minions would enter the store after I left. I did not go back into the store to see what they were doing, but it was too consistent. They started to intimidate me by waiting outside the store staring at me. I eventually lost interest in playing the lottery because I was unable to win anything and I had a feeling it was somehow being fixed by them. 
As large a presence the Nameless have in this reality I could see that they would use something like the state lottery to enrich their organization. If you are new to this blog and have not read the past posts, those I refer to as the Nameless have the ability to hear the thoughts of others as well as prescience. It would not be too difficult if the winners were their many minions giving the prize money to the organization or purchasing goods and services from their extensive network of business. 
Powerball

When Powerball came to California something interesting happened. I played one time using the kiosks or vending machines instead of going to a store and purchasing the ticket from a cashier. As I purchased a ticket there was someone behind me, slightly off to one side as if the were looking at the numbers I was selecting. 
I purchased some tickets at a later date, and suspecting that someone will be standing behind me, I selected numbers randomly as fast as I could, my own version of the quick pick, without knowing what numbers I was selecting. I finished with the first ticket I turned to see a woman standing behind me as the other person did the first time. She had a confused look on her face as if  she was having difficulty keeping up. I repeated the process a couple of other times as fast as I could and took my tickets and turned to walk away. A cast a glance in her direction and she looked down at the floor. 
Powerball is a multistage lottery and the Nameless might not have the ability to control the prizes even if they might have a high success rate using prescience (they might not have 100% accuracy using prescience) there are far too many players to secure sole winning tickets. 
If I win any sum of money I will post it here. Imagine if the Nameless with their abilities of prescience have been winning the lottery for some time. Talk about easy money. 
Etheric Energy Device

One of the warnings I received pertaining to the device I use is that it has the capacity to enhance the ability to manifest thoughts in reality. The warning came from the person that created the device after using several devices at the junction points of a tetrahedron he constructed. The tone of that warning was somewhat ominous. 
The device I am using has aided me in the ability to manifest my thoughts in this reality (enhancing the abilities I had acquired from the void and from the use of white powdered gold) but, this ability has been limited by the Nameless when they use their own electromagnetic devices on me in the past on many occasions.
NOTE: I had written this post as a draft at first and did not post immediately. The Nameless came out of the woodwork last night and did their best to keep me occupied. Their attacks lasted until after the Powerball numbers were made available and then all of a sudden the attacks stopped. I guess they were trying to prevent me from trying to manifest a winning ticket. I did not try, I still haven’t looked at the numbers of my last ticket purchase, maybe I should. 
I will edit and update this post at a later time, I just wanted to get this out as fast as possible. The Nameless do not seem to be happy about my lottery activity. This needs more attention. 
More to come.

The Following Day

The day of the Powerball draw was interesting. My neighbors were home, not usual, and they were keeping tabs on me, even the neighbors that just moved in. There was a lot of foot traffic in front of the house as I was working on some projects. The entire day was a bit odd to say the least.

Today the neighbors are all away from home and it is pretty quiet, normal. The electromagnetic activity is lower, but still persistent. I am looking forward to the next draw to see if it will all happen again. The minions of the Nameless are pretty consistent in their behavior. They either can’t resist or they aren’t capable of realizing how obvious they are. This makes me wonder if they are a bunch of mindless zombies playing some sort of game.

More Fear

~ 3maxxxam3 ~ Leave a comment
The long dark emptiness of the void
LITANY AGAINST FEAR

I must not fear.
Fear is the mind-killer.
Fear is the little-death that brings total obliteration.
I will face my fear.
I will permit it to pass over me and through me.
And when it has gone past I will turn the inner eye to see its path.
Where the fear has gone there will be nothing.
Only I will remain.

The “Litany Against Fear” is from the novel by Frank Herbert’s Dune series. Still one of the most important works of science fiction to date.

On the morning of my journey through the void, my very own spiritual resurrection. The fear was so overwhelming it occupied all of my senses. I was consumed by it. I ran from that fear. The violence that I thought I had perpetrated made me want to run. Hundreds and thousands of beings chasing me. Sirens were blaring as I ran fighting through a level of confusion I had never ever faced in my life (I cannot remember correctly, but I believe I heard them shouting ‘there he is’). I ran under an overpass and turned to face the pack that was chasing me, but there was nothing there. Silence, peace and the unsettling emptiness of the void. 

I found myself at a familiar street corner S.O.F.A. South First Street Area in downtown San Jose ( S. First and E. San Salvador). There were beings, several of them, pushing me and calling me names. They were referencing my racial heritage they used every possible innuendo. I felt their hatred, it was the most hatred I had ever felt at one time. As I stood there in the middle of the intersection they where shouting and pushing me. They surrounded me. I felt their hands as they shoved me toward each other. I did nothing. I focused on nothing. I did not fight back and then it stopped. I was standing in my apartment covered in sweat, exhausted, but relieve the fear had passed through me. 

I now know the perpetrators of the horrors I faced that morning. The Nameless where there forcing that fear upon me. They were the ones pushing me. I can almost feel who they were now. I can almost recognize them. I can do this now because they are at it again. I can feel them focusing their fear upon me. It is distinct in that it comes from outside of my self. I can almost sense it’s direction and source. It is not like a panic attack where the source comes from the mind generated by thoughts of known fears, this fear is without substance. Raw fear that allows you to fill in the blanks. 

I recite the litany against fear and focus upon the moment and the fear subsides. I recognize and focus upon the source. I look back at the perpetrator and the are forced to look away. I tell them that karmic retribution is at their door, it comes for them. I apologize, but note that it is not my doing, I am only the witness. 

The past few days, have been heavy with this fear. The Nameless know that I am able to manifest my thoughts in my conscious reality (as you do also). They know that if they can induce fear in me I will manifest my own monsters. Fascinating tactic, they plant the seed and I nurture the beast. 

They do most of their evil deeds when I sleep (radiation, inception). I am most vulnerable at that time, we are all vulnerable at that time. We wake up and the notion of fear creeps into our daily life. We look for it and then we find what we are looking or focused upon. 

They are persistent. Many, many sources. The minions are out in force staring at me from a distance dong their part. Poor soulless souls, slaves to empty promises. The pendulum now swings in the opposite direction. The age of fear is subsiding. I fear they will be lost forever, clinging to the bushes and grasses of this place for several eternities. 

Fear And Loathing in Hawaii

In Hawaii there was one rather large man of Samoan/Hawaiian descent. They would call him to follow me when I left my apartment. It was during the time I was writing me ebook. The fear they induced in me became real when I saw him. As this tactic continued I began to question what I was feeling and I would leave my apartment and then return quickly to an elevated parking garage at the apartment building. I saw him walking towards the apartment talking on the phone and looking for someone. I watched him standing beneath my observation post in the garage. He was waiting for me so he could play his part. The last time I saw him we walked toward each other. As we approached each other I looked him in the eyes and he looked away. He continued walking, nothing happened.

In the recent past they have sent strangers to my door. They just walk up when I am in the garage and try to act friendly in a menacing way. This stopped during my recent year of inactivity and has resumed again. I suspect that they will take it up a notch. I will post those instances here.

Fear As A Method of Control

We hear in America live in a perpetual state of fear. Constantly bombarded by news segments of impending harm, death and debt. We are not safe and there are those that offer resolutions, safety and sanctuary. Noam Chomsky stated that they create the problem then offer their solution. The solution often requires that you give something up in return (civil rights, liberty). The Nameless offer that they will stop this fear mongering if I stop posting on this blog. I can go back to a life free from fear if I give up my right to live my life in any way I choose to. I can not accept their meager offer. I tried to ignore them, but my life stalled in a perpetual loop indicating I had to act. I refuse to live that way.

I have created another phrase by witch I refer to the Nameless. I have called them parasites of consciousness, but it seems the are also bullies of consciousness as well. The offspring (little demons) of their minions are bullies as well, practicing their craft at a young age to be applied in adulthood. Generations of bullies for their cause. Let’s see if I can draw them out from behind the darkness and safety of their anonymity and coax them out into the light for all to see. That’s what this is all about. They were revealed to me some 14 years ago and now I can no longer ignore them.

Fear prevents any significant movement to higher levels of consciousness. Fear interrupts the flow of energy from the heart (heart chakra) to the brain (crown chakra). Fear is the electric fence that defines the prison of this existence. Fear occupies the place where positive emotions can flourish. The evil of the Nameless is based upon fear. Subdue the fear and disarm the Nameless. Often the threat of harm is far more powerful than the harm itself.