Journal: Perfection

Moon waning crescent 25.4 days, Libra – Air. Time 00:03, planet hours: Saturn.

My belief that everything has meaning, and all things are the way the should be continues to grow in strength. Faith is a word that has been echoing throughout my intuition. Whenever I feel impatient, chaotic and confused I am reminded to have faith. Nothing is wasted, all actions have purpose regardless of our judgement. Abraham is correct, faith occurs when you accept the law of attraction within the whole of consciousness. That which is delegated to consciousness will become…

There is only the order of consciousness, chaos only exists for those that are unable to understand this. Within this artificial system of existence there are increasing levels of complexity, but at the root is the ever expanding foundation of consciousness. The whole of consciousness is the substrate to which we are anchored, there is no other way. Consciousness is pervasive. Consciousness is consistent. Consciousness is perfection.

What Next?

I was helping a family member with some therapy exercises. The tasks were difficult and caused a bit of frustration, laden with anxiety, when they performed them. We persisted and slowed the pace to try to alleviate the difficulties. When we completed the exercises I retreated to my room and felt frustrated and anxious also. I had a distinct tightening in my throat. The next day we began the therapeutic exercises again. As the family member began to encounter the same difficulties as before, I noticed the same symptoms welling up within me again even though there was no reason for me to feel that way. It occurred to me that I might be experiencing sympathetic resonance. If we use the example of a musical instrument such as a guitar, sympathetic resonance occurs when a string is plucked and the neighboring strings begin to vibrate with a harmonic likeness. After a little shallow research on the internet I was lead to sites and articles about Empaths. After some further reading it occurred to me that I may be a Empath or possibly an Empathic Psychic. Discovering this was a very significant emotional event. It felt as if every single memory of significant moments in my life spilled out before my mind’s eye forced into view by a wave of emotions. Clarity washed over me, but also an unsettling question emerged from my gut, “what next?”. That thought began repeating for some time and I even started to say it out loud.

As a child I had vivid conscious dreams accompanied by physical sensations from worlds I had never before seen. It was difficult experiencing and sensing a vivid dream overlayed upon this conscious reality (I still get glimpses of this phenomenon). I wrestled with emotions that I now know were not my own, and not understanding that this was not normal, I was not normal. I started from wide social acceptance during adolescence and then later to a social outcast fueled by abilities I did not know I had. I sought the comfort of self medication which later lead to better understanding of my own physiology and psychology through experimentation. And then, rebooting my conscious mind with psychedelics and seemingly awakening to a level of consciousness filled with people and beings that are bent upon suppressing my conscious expansion. My higher unconscious self has been revealed to be a patient, yet unrelenting Taskmaster, or a tenacious Zen monk constantly cracking me on my shoulder with his shinai, never allowing me to fully drift into complacency. Now it seems I may have always been an Empath, but ignoring those abilities just so I could be normal.

It explains my past and current experiences. It explains my choppy social interactions and why I seek out solitude over fellowship. It explains why I can no longer watch certain types of films, online videos or television programs without experiencing intense emotions of what I see. It answers the question of how I am able to sense coming events. It explains why I have difficulty with one-on-one conversations with strangers, most of them leaving me feeling overtly self-conscious. It explains why I sometimes get confused during conversations as if I am hearing to two radio stations at the same time. It explains why I felt every possible emotion during my psychedelic quest through the void, now understanding they weren’t my own. It explains the many times I sensed people (mainly women of middle age) observing me or attempting to gain my attention and then find them looking at me, knowingly, in a way that seems to indicate we might be the same. It explains why I am under constant surveillance, as if to keep me from being contacted by those observers or others like myself. It explains those conversations with thought forms from destinations unknown I experienced in Hawaii. Why some people I meet take a step back when I shake their hand as if they were caught off guard by an emotion from an external source (this happened, again, when I recently encountered a person with similar abilities through Craigslist, post Combo-Shift – one of ‘the others’). It explains why some people (mostly younger people under 20) stare at me as if I was some new kind of life form. I am amazed that I survived this long not understanding what was happening, what I have become, or possibly what I have always been. Still, I ask “what next?”.

Lately I have been apprehensive to go out into the world. I seem to be bouncing from one level of consciousness to the next on a daily, sometimes hourly, basis. It is a lot like going outside not knowing what the weather is going to be like. But, I still venture out eager to see what level I seem to be on. Since I posted “Significance” I feel as if my third eye (cliché) has opened yet squinting to filter all that it is now able to see. As I write this post I remember asking for this. Asking to restore my abilities that I thought were taken from me. So, what next?

Those unseen entities are working overtime. That ever-present feeling of fear pecking at the confines of my inner consciousness. I smell their fear. I sense their desperation. I see weakness. Existing on the leading edge of the expansion of consciousness is such a trying, yet beautiful thing. Every moment I am on the threshold of something that has yet to be, and I can influence its manifestation. So to answer the question of “what next?”. The answer may very well be just about “anything I fucking want”, it seems. They may be able to slow me down, but I am now motivated by something deep within. It animates my physical form. It drags me out of bed before sunrise and now shows me what I need to see. My higher unconscious self is rising from within and I am no longer reluctant to let it be. Satori?

Thank you…

Journal: Significance

Moon waxing gibbous 13.1 days, Aquarius – Air. Time 14:18, planet hours: Venus.

I have to mark this moment as one of particular significance. I will elaborate on it at a later time, when I have taken enough time to understand what has just been revealed to me.

Epiphanic to say the least…

Journal: Criptic

Moon waxing gibbous 8.7 days, Sagitarius – Fire. Time 14:18, planet hours: Sun.

Resonance is the most significant aspect of this conscious environment, or possibly any level of consciousness. Resonance is the very fabric (cliché) of the foundation of this existence. How do I know this? I am now under constant attack. This provides me with a unique environment to experiment. The attacks come in two separate and often combined forms. The first being electronic and the second being psychic. The electronic form is pervasive, it affects everyone due to entrainment. The psychic form is specific. The sources are irrelevant because they are covert, sometimes unintentional and undetectable as evidence. It is important to focus on the defence and preservation of a resonant signature that is aligned with ascension, and or the expansion of conscious states within this physical conscious reality.

August 18 2018, 21:36 – Shifts in my conscious environment were prompted by a change in my conscious resonant frequency. Meditation alone cannot alleviate a coordinated attack. A familiar dark cloud forms with a palpable element of fear and hopelessness. Noise levels increase in my neighboring environment with an underlying sinister tone. I utilize my devices and restore my normal state of conscious resonance. I am giddy as my conscious environment becomes peaceful and quiet. I am still amazed by the nature of these events. They remind me of my passage through the void, a very familiar tactic by those familiar dark entities.

The methods I have found effective are specific in the preservation of natural and possibly ancient frequencies that are far more abundant than those disruptive, possibly weaponized, artificial frequencies mentioned above (psychic methods are resonant thought forms that need not travel in the nonlocal environment of consciousness). Symbols (words, signs, 2D and 3D structures) have specific resonant signatures that are resistant to entrainment and are beacons that are capable of interfering with harmful frequencies. One particular 3D form that has significant energetic, biological, resistive and defensive properties is the octahedron, popularly known by its exposed structural half as a pyramid. I am theorizing that most ancient (predating Egyptian appropriation) pyramid structures are octahedrons (one of the platonic solids), one half exposed to the air (electrical – 100 lightning strikes per second on average on this planet) and the other half buried in the earth (ground). These structures exist on the surface of a planet spinning 1000 mph, 1609 km/hr traveling 18 mps, 30 km/s. Are there octahedrons on the poles?

Water – 2 parts hydrogen, one part oxygen. As mentioned in other posts, water is the substrate of consciousness. Plants utilize the energy of the sun’s resonance to dismantle the molecule to harvest hydrogen and release oxygen. It is capable of exhibiting three resonant forms, vapor, liquid and solid (holy trinity). It makes up 70 percent of the human biology and highly concentrated in the brian. It is the conduit of conscious frequencies, capable of retaining entrainment. While living in Hawaii, I spent 4-5 days each week either swimming or surfing. The accumulation of energy prompted a conscious expansion within me that threatened those greater than I. It is the source of all things.

639 – As it is above, so it is below.

Journal: Tangibility

Moon waning crescent 26.4  days, Cancer – Water. Time 14:45, planet hours: Mercury.

Consciousness is something that I can sense in a quasi-physical way. I beleive that everything within the whole of consciousness is conscious, but not all things are alive. There is an aspect of consciousness that I am beginning to feel or sense as pressure. This could be an attempt by my frame of reference to make sense out of what I am sensing. This stimulus could be a vibration, or resonance, from an energy field or an entity with a very energetic resonance.

I cannot sense and emotional component of the pressure, it is neither negative nor positive. The pressure is not always present, but when I feel it is a very tangible experience for my conscious mind. I interpret the pressure, or energy field, somewhat like opening an oven and feeling the heat radiate over the front of your body, but there is no heat or atmospheric disturbance caused by the rising heat energy. You know it is there, so much so, that you are compelled to reach out and try to touch it.

At this time I do not know what it is. And, as I write this senence I can feel/sense it on the front of my chest, neck and face.

Journal: Follow Me

Moon waning crescent 25.7  days, Cancer – Water. Time 23:35, planet hours: Venus.

I ran some errands and crossed paths with a group of young men that were following me on foot. It is fortunate that people have difficulty hiding their emotions. The face and eyes will usually betray a person when they encounter something unexpected.

What made this interesting was that they were trying to hide their faces, at least the ones behind the person leading the expedition. Shifty looking character, which makes them easier to remember. Something is a little different now. They looked like they may have been able to handle themselves.

So what was their purpose? Are they trying to provoke me or intimidate me? I have been here before, there is little that intimidates me anymore. They looked like they were the ones that were intimidated. What could they possibly be afraid of?

I beleive that they are afraid that I will realize what I am, or will become. To be completely honest, I share their fear. My unconscious still won’t show me what I want to see. Maybe they can help me awaken that dormant part of me. The pace begins to quicken.

Spooky action at a distance.