Moon waning crescent 23.9 days, Taurus – Earth. Time 23:03, planet hours: Jupiter.
I was engaged in a self talk session a few moments ago. It occurred to me that I susceptible to the thoughts and feelings of others in an indirect manner. I believe it people who have this ability are called empaths, but I do not consider myself one. I am probably sensitive to the emotional energy of people in my immediate conscious environment. An overload of background noise…
This helps to explain why I enjoy isolated places. Afternoon bike rides to the top of a mountain during the middle of the week were always worth the struggle to get there so I can take in the silence. When I rode with someone it wasn’t as rewarding and I never understood why until now. The silence and possibly the absence of thoughts (emotional energy) was what drove me to isolated areas.
The feeling of a kind of emotional relief or the absence of emotional energy, other than my own, is very satisfying and uplifting. I cannot find that satisfaction in populated areas. This has never been more evident in my life than at this moment. Meditation offers some relief, but it never compares to complete isolation.
Location, location, location…
The Silence is a song that resonates in a perpetual manner within me now.
In the past I spoke of a golden seed growing within me. It seems I have been swept up into the tail of a comet, caught within its trailing vortex. The song seems to embody the blissful helplessness of this wondrous experience.
I have opened up my heart and surrendered to the whole of consciousness fully. I now know what samadhi means.
As it has happened in the past the silence washes over me without warning. I sense it in the background, an ever present stillness. I can no longer differentiate between inner and outer realms of the self.
While sitting and creating my day this morning my thoughts just stopped. I found myself in a meditative state that lasted about three hours or more (I can only approximate the passage of time).
I am experiencing a new sensation. I do not seem to be moving though life, but life (this conscious reality) seems to be moving towards me as I surrender to the stillness within me.
Is this what they have tried to prevent from happening? What used to be so difficult seem effortless now. I cannot tell if they were real or the manifestation of my conscious ego. Not so important now.
Blessings to all who have read this.