Journal: Limits Of Language

Moon waning crescent 22.4 days, Capricorn – Earth. Time 08:14, planet hours: Mars.

As the infinite continues to influence my perceptions of my conscious experience, I am facing a kind of paradox. A direct opposition emerges between this finite reality and that of the infinite.

The language we use is base in chronology, a time based syntax (past tense, present tense, etc.) that confines us to this conscious reality. It is our language that limits our perceptions. Beginning, middle and end are illusions. Evolution is an illusion. “Moving forward in my life” is an illusory cliche.

As I am writing this, I am struck by something I once heard. A mantra, “I have everything I need”. When thought of in a time based mindset, it connotes a finite notion of being complete, “I have all I need, I do not need anything else”. In the construct of the infinite, it connotes all infinite possibilities are accessible. Within that sentences lies the paradox. Can I access all infinite possibilities from the confines of the finite conscious reality of this existence?

Where is here? Why am I still here? My conscious (time based) reality is stagnant. Yet my unconscious (timeless) reality is fluid. My unconscious travels are without limit. That which I cannot remember is due to the limited confines of my conscious mind. I cannot remember that which I am unable to define or describe. I am here (place and time) because it is safe. I am here out of fear. Fear is a word based in a language of chronology. Fear does not have meaning in a language of immortality.

Shifting levels of consciousness and dimensional shifts prepare for the infinite. They are perceived as shifts in time, but they may actually be quantum shifts within the infinite. There is fallacy in every reality. Pointless participation, a necessity of emancipation.

A thought experiment: I believe that infinite versions of myself exist simultaneously within the infinite of consciousness. Every possible desire already exists on parallel/similar and intersecting planes/points of existence. I am entangled with every version of myself and influence, as well as, being influenced by those versions. Some of those versions of myself are intimately aware of the other versions. 

Journal: Under Attack

Moon waxing crescent 7.7 days, Cancer – Water. Time 13:35, planet hours: Jupiter.

I am currently under a significant Dark Arts attack. I am having difficulty thinking and some motor functions are effected. I am allowing this to happen and not doing any attempt to protect myself. In fact I am getting ready to run an errand to completely expose myself to anything my antagonists can do to end this (me).

The energy is dark right now during the first quarter of the lunar cycle (March 14 12:25-13:21 March 15). This is the opportune time for them to attack. They usually do so during this window, but this is attack is fairly significant.

This is in response to some significant steps I have taken to restore my energy levels (life force). Before the attacks started, I never felt better and feel similar to when the attacks began in Hawaii in 2011. I have been defiant and provoking them since earlier in the day and yet I am still here. I am ready to test my beliefs and hoping that they will facilitate my transition.

Check back later for updates to this post to see if I survive this…

Spoiler Alert: Due to the inept abilities of my antagonists (Jinn), I am probably not going anywhere… 

Update: Nothing happened. The usual feckless suspects (minions) were out about keeping track of my coming and going, but nothing significant. I must admit I am a little disappointed.

Let me provide some info that has occurred in the past couple of days. I have been experimenting with a device that I revisited from some years ago. I did so after my intuition (subconscious or higher self) reminded me of something I did with a coil and sound files. I started to use the device and found that they were helpful. I began to use the device on my energy centers (meridians) and was able to improve the flow of energy within my body. With further work I found that my antagonists were causing a disruption in the flow of energy while I was unconscious (vulnerable), something that I have written about here in the past. I was able to use the device to counter the attacks while I was unconscious over the past couple of days using newly discovered frequencies.

As I was experimenting I discovered that my dreams were unobstructed and I was able to remember them the next morning. I was feeling better waking upon sunrise and I noticed that my antagonists were beginning to increase their attacks as I continued to gain energy. Yesterday, Wednesday, I woke up feeling as if I had a low energy partied all night kind of hangover. I was drained (part of their attempt to keep me from rising with the sun), but I was able to counter the effects with my device. Last night I deployed a set of frequencies (chord) to the device and used it throughout the night and morning. I had fun and enlightening dreams and when I woke up I was happy and energetic still in the glow of the dreams I experienced. It felt like I was on fire, so to speak, in a very good way. I used the frequencies on my energy meridians and the flow of energy increased. It felt like I unclogged a drain pipe. Later this morning, I was dancing for no reason (something they used to punish me for when I was in Hawaii).

Then the attacks began and they were of the type that feel like my life force was being drained. I recognized that feeling from when I was attacked in Southern California and then again in Hawaii. So, I decided to use the opportunity to see how far they would go, and began to provoke them to try harder. They did, but in the end it was ineffective. This is the second time I dared them to take my life and they backed off. I wanted them to facilitate my transition to another level of consciousness other than this one, and that did not happen. So, I am still here (wherever that is).

These parasites of consciousness are inept bullies. Once you figure out their modes of operation they are nothing but a pesky annoyance, constantly meddling in your life. I am preparing to present my latest experiences with the entities I now call Jinn and their feckless minions in the next post. I have a feeling they are enjoying this almost as much as I am.

Vibrational frequency is everything…

Time to level up.

Journal: What Matters?

Moon waxing gibbous 13.7 days, Sagittarius – Fire. Time 21:45, planet hours: Jupiter.

From  the perspective of conscious immortality, there are pitfalls. I know that I am an immortal conscious being, but in my current physical state there are perceived limitations prior to mastering consciousness. Time is not on my side within this conscious simulation. During the waxing and waning of the moon I cycle through similar emotional states.

I can see the infinite within the finite. There are no limits within the confines of consciousness. Abraham was right, there is so much in abundance and it is fitting because the unbridled expansion of consciousness requires it. My role is defined and as every bit in constant flux. It is all a fascinating bit of theater. Everything singing its own song, all in the same key, not always in my prefered pitch.

Acceptance is a wedge that pries at my attachments and well honed habits. I struggle to care. If it is all a dream then why should I care at all? Everything is temporary. It always has been and forever will be. The chaos is just a facade of what we are unable to understand, all while never knowing we sing the same song

What matters? Everything and nothing, soon to be replaced by some other thing even though they all now seem to be the same thing. Consciousness wastes nothing.

3 6 9

Journal: Training Day

What is always a refreshing aspect of my challenge to live a life of freedom within the constraints of this illusion, is the response I receive from my antagonists for my defiant actions. Today I get to bathe in the oppressive electromagnetic radiation for the post I published yesterday concerning the “sonic attack” reported in the news. Their response affirms that my actions were appropriate for my cause.

The robotic nature of the response is something that I have grown accustomed to over the past seven years of escalated attacks since Hawaii. It comes and goes and yet I still have not changed my behavior. There must be some kind of dislocation regarding how time is perceived in relation to this level of consciousness and whatever dimensional reality they exist within. For the past seven years I have evolved, but they have not. This aspect of their behavior has been noted by others as well. I see it as an exploitable characteristic, they are vulnerable if they are incapable of evolving and adapting to change.

At this moment the level of radiation has diminished. My current and consistent acts of defiance may eventually wear them down. In the end, I know I have already won, even if there is no end for my immortal soul…

These are happier times. Remaining in this state of happiness is my most potent weapon. They may have mastered consciousness, but they have not mastered me.

We barely remember who or what came before this precious moment
We are choosing to be here right now
Hold on, stay inside…

This holy reality, this holy experience
Choosing to be here in…
This body, this body holding me
Be my reminder here that I am not alone in…
This body, this body holding me, feeling eternal
All this pain is an illusion


In this holy reality, in this holy experience
Choosing to be here in…
This body, this body holding me
Be my reminder here that I am not alone in…
This body, this body holding me, feeling eternal
All this pain is an illusion

Twirling round with this familiar parable
Spinning, weaving round each new experience
Recognize this as a holy gift and celebrate this chance to be alive and breathing
A chance to be alive and breathing

This body holding me reminds me of my own mortality
Embrace this moment, remember, we are eternal
All this pain is an illusion

Journal: Enlightenment 1.1


Meditation is not something that I do anymore, it is something that happens to me. Differing states of mind are natural whether they are induced or influenced by many different internal and external stimuli (built in comparative analysis of our conscious states). Sometimes I struggle to sustain a shallow state of mindlessness and sometimes deep meditative states wash over me at anytime or anyplace. And, when these deep states occur there is usually a message associated with that meditative occurrence.

Today was one of those days in which a deep meditative state occurred. The message concerned my relationship with the concept of enlightenment. Previous notions of enlightenment were overly simplified. One cannot understand what enlightenment is if they are not enlightened, just as people that are blind from birth are unable to understand the concept of color.

What I had hoped for was some sort of rapture. A definitive point in time when I would cross the threshold from the darkness into the light. I was hoping to have an Eckhart Tolle moment of realization, but for me that was not the case. Today I was given and opportunity to see where I was. I was given a snapshot of my relationship with enlightenment.

At this time enlightenment is a never ending process of conscious evolution. In a way enlightenment no longer exists as a definitive state of mind. The battles I fought in pursuit of enlightenment were part of the process. The process, as I now understand it, was never about attaining anything, but more about returning to my innate state of being. If one is seeking purpose then that purpose is the perpetual expansion of consciousness.

We have words that describe a concept of ‘no beginning’ and ‘no end’. One word is infinite. It is difficult to grasp the meaning of the infinite. Even our physicists purport that there exists a beginning to our universe, conceptualized as the “big bang”. In our materialistic world view we experience beginnings and endings, creation and decay, life and death so it is difficult to understand that which is infinite. Today I was given a snapshot of my life and what was a scarred and battered past I am now able to see an infinite expanse of possibilities (conscious immortality).

I have been frustrated and sometimes infuriated with those around me. How can you not see what is right in front of you? “I must be surrounded by idiots” (mostly thought, but rarely spoken). That frustration has prompted self isolation. Lately I have wanted to end my self imposed isolation, but do so gradually so that I won’t be perceived as bipolar. Enlightenment was once described to me as trying to swallow a red hot iron ball, but I never allowed myself to consider the psychological fortitude that was going to be necessary. The analogy of the iron ball was taken literally, not as a metaphor for the painful mental, and eventual, conscious transition(s).

I am certain that my current concept will not persist, it will continue to evolve and expand. The process of enlightenment is to set in motion that which is stagnant. Our existence is not about beginning and endings, it is about transitions. Perpetual conscious evolution awaits. Transient enlightened states are my new normal. My constant state of frustration is being undermined by happiness. I sometimes find myself pushing back against these persistent eruptions of happiness fearing that they may foretell an inevitable slide into insanity. I have been fighting so long that I have forgotten how to allow the very thing I have been fighting for.

I sit here now finding it hard to stop grinning, ready to take another step…